Not so sure about your relationship? Can't really tell what it is that is going on? Whether you are in a love relationship or a business relationship, the signs are the same...Maybe they are taking advantage of you! That's right, maybe you are just being walked all over. Here are some signs to help you decide if that is what is happening to you.
- It's hard to define the relationship. You know the scenario, someone asks you about your boyfriend, you stutter and start to say something like, "well, he's not really my boyfriend. We are just seeing where things go." In reality, you aren't dating anyone else, you wait by the phone, hoping he will call and you have no idea if he is actually seeing other people. In business, it could be the same. You might have someone you want to do business with, but it starts to feel like all talk and no action. The lack of committment is maddening, but particulary when you don't know what the other person wants or what they are doing. It is one thing to see other people and agree upon it, clearly. It is a whole other to be evasive and not want to talk about the relationship with each other. Which brings us to......
- Communication is evasive. Your business partner or client says they want to do a project but never get into the details or committ to anything. You feel strung along, trying to decipher any hidden meanings that will give you a clue about where this is all going. Maybe in your relationships, you ask for what you need and you never get an answer. Requests are put off and you are left feeling unheard...which then leads to
- It's all about them. They talk about themselves, their business, their needs, but never really ask or seem to care about yours. You find that they have no clue about you, your life, your work, or your needs.
- You work harder. Relationships, whether personal or business, require some reciprocity - some give and take. You might convince yourself that you don't mind or you love what you are doing, but in reality, you are the one who always calls, always plans or organizes or always cover for the other person. And what do you get in return?
- You feel resentment. You are starting to notice all of the above and it irritates you, just a little. When they ask for things, you might get a little passive aggressive with your communication. When you feel like the victim, you know that you are in an unhealthy situation.
If you realize you are being taken advantage of, know that it doesn't HAVE to be that way. You have choices. You can get out of the relationship or you can confront the issues and get help. Yes, it might be painful, scary, or anxiety provoking. But, you are the one that gets to control who you let in and out of your life, in all areas.
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