You might think that parenting is most precious when children are babies. Everything is so new and exciting. Plus, when the baby naps — and they nap often — the parents can get intimate. Not so. According to a survey of over 100 mental health professionals, 80% of experts agree that couples become happier as their kids grow up. Wanna learn why? Find out below.
1. You can have quality time together. It's been a long time since you've had the opportunity to really spend time on prioritizing your relationship rather than running carpools. Now's the time to to get back to date nights and renew your appreciation of each other. — Karen Sherman
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2. You can fight in peace. As adults, you know that conflicts are part of a normal relationship, but when kids hear you having one, it's scary. Now that they're out of the house, you can have your conflicts in private, allowing you to repair them properly so you can get closer. — Karen Sherman
3. There's far less stress. The more people there are, the more needs there are to attend to. Once the kids are gone, the majority of the time, you can focus on the needs of each other. — Karen Sherman
4. There's time to relight the romance. As kids become more independent, couples have more guilt-free "us" time. When kids are young, meeting their needs often takes a village – and when there is no village available (especially in the form of babysitters, grandparents, or alternative caregivers), both parents must devote almost 100% of their energy and time to manage and meet those needs.
When children begin to have independent lives, parents are able to redirect their resources to each other. There is nothing more odd than the first time that your Saturday night is completely free because all of your kids are "doing their own thing." And, when that includes sleeping over at a friend's house, that Saturday night can be the perfect opportunity to rekindle the romance, passion and love. — Marni Battista
5. Your activities become more mature. Family time includes activities that adults actually enjoy versus activities that are mostly child-centered. There is nothing more amazing than taking your kids to Disneyland as a couple and realizing that you didn't even set foot in Toon Town! As your kids grow, you can share new, exciting, adventurous experiences together as a family that will strengthen your relationship like it did when you were first dating.
Whether it's riding the rapids together (and not worrying that your babies are going to drown), stayingup 'til Midnight to watch fireworks from the top of the Eiffel Tower (no more worrying about naptime or cranky babies) or going to a hip music festival (wow, you actually can enjoy the same music as your kids!), these activities provide opportunities for you to be a couple within a family framework. No doubt it's pretty romantic to have that passionate, Eiffel Tower kiss when your kids aren't looking! — Marni Battista
6. Less hands-on care means more time for you. As children develop, they become more self-sufficient and require less hands-on care and less eye-to-eye time. As constant dependence lessens over time, parents aren't so tired and "consumed," and have more time for their own self-care, their relationship with each other and their own friendships. — Wendy Kay
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Want to learn more? Tune in now through September 18 for the YourTango Experts intensive event, Love After Kids, featuring all kinds of advice and insights from our experts about the unique challenges of coparenting in the digital age.1. There's far more time for the two of you.
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