When it comes to financial matters, is your husband being totally upfront with you? Financial infidelity can be just as devastating to a relationship as emotional or sexual infidelity. Don't let your relationship fall victim to this deadly threat. Here are some signs that suggest that — when it comes to his spending and saving habits — he may be hiding something from you.
1. He keeps his finances separate from yours. If he insists you must have separate credit cards and bank accounts, it's time to start asking questions. A lack of transparency is almost always a sign that someone has something to hide. Our advice: Show him your checkbook, your credit card statements and any other financial info first, then ask him to do the same. If you're willing to put your stuff out there, he should be, too. —Bethany and Scott Palmer
2. He's too controlling. When one person in the relationship manages all of the financial details, it means there's a lack of trust. And that's where infidelity starts. Our advice: Tell him you want to take a more active role in dealing with your finances, and that you want to start making money decisions together. Even if you're not great at managing money, you need to have an equal say in where it comes from and where it goes. —Bethany and Scott Palmer
3. He's hiding bills. If he's always the one to get the mail or has all the financial info sent to his email account, he could be committing financial infidelity. Our advice: If you haven't seen a bill or statement for a while, ask about them. If there's nothing to hide, he'll show them to you. If he doesn't want you to see them, call the bank or company yourself and ask for your own copy of the bill or the statement. Then talk about what you discover. —Bethany and Scott Palmer
4. He is unwilling to have finances held jointly. Certainly, this choice can come from other sources. However, if it is not about hiding or sneaking, then your partner should be willing to discuss his reasons for wanting separation of finances and his overall financial picture. Try to work toward at least some shared finances in the future. —Tracy Deagan
5. He is unwilling to do joint financial planning. Again, he could have other reasons for his reluctance, but if he is unwilling to plan for your financial future together, that is a big red flag. Generally, folks that have nothing to hide are willing to plan jointly, especially if they are married, have children, or have financial responsibilities together. —Tracy Deagan
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