Love, Heartbreak

Why You Shouldn't Care If He Calls Or Not

Let's begin with a personal story.

I'm in the healthiest relationship of my life, with the most amazing guy who treats me like gold.  I love everything about him, but it hasn't always been like this.  I, ever so sweetly of course, love to remind him of our first online date, when we'd had such a wonderful time and connected on so many levels, and he promised he'd call...said he couldn't wait to see me again, yada yada.

I didn't see him again for two months. He'd come and go as he pleased, pull me close and then push me away. This cycle repeated time after time and each time I promised I wouldn't give him another chance. I tried to date other guys, and online dated like it was my job, but each time my phone vibrated, I hoped it was him.

Until one day, I didn't. 

It wasn't because I was pissed off, or didn't care about him.  I did, so so much but I had come to a point where I was tired of holding myself back.  Tired of waiting and jumping everytime my phone rang, feeling disappointed when it was someone else. Tired of being a slave to someone else's journey and handing my self worth and personal identity to him.

Just because a guy doesn't call you when he says he will doesn't make him a terrible person. A bit rude?  Yes.  But we are so quick to vilify them when they don't do what we want them to.  When they aren't ready for what we want them to be ready for.  When we don't want to listen to what he's telling us.

And even if he's not calling, he's still most definitely talking.  He's telling you that he's not 100% invested, that he's not there yet, for whatever reason.  Perhaps he isn't interested and is trying to let you down easy.  Or maybe he is, but just isn't ready.

Either way, there is nothing to wait for.  When you first begin dating someone, there's no sense in waiting by the phone. You've put yourself out there, taken a step towards finding love and the right person for you will want to walk with you-not behind you.  Step back and allow him to walk his own journey, but most importantly, keep on yours...and you never know, maybe he'll catch up.

It can happen...trust me.

Now stop staring at your phone.