From the good guy always finishing first to finding love by making eye contact inside a coffee shop, Hollywood isn’t always all that accurate about romance. In fact, when it comes to the question of how to attract women, Hollywood is a down right liar. The city’s pants are on fire. Hollywood is a town whose wealth was largely built by producing fictional stories, tales meant to draw us away from our stressful, complicated lives. And, in that respect, the lies it tells are benign.
The problem arises when men wondering how to attract women let their DVDs grab them by the balls and lead the way, right into a pit of misinformation. They recreate who they are, striving to become the type of guy they believe women want. In reality, many of the “must haves” promoted by Hollywood aren’t vital at all; in fact, not only are they not the answers to the evasive question of "how to attract women," but they are also things women may never even think about.
So, what are these lies? Hollywood is full of them (Did you know that Toy Story wasn’t even true?). When it comes to females, the biggest fake-outs include:
Women only go for men who are drop dead gorgeous: Women want to be attracted to the guy they are dating, but they happen to be attracted to personality above all else. In other words, how to attract women rarely has anything to do with being drop dead gorgeous. Instead, it has to do with heart. Women are more attracted to men who are respectful, communicative, kind, and funny than they ever will be to a full head of hair and a face full of dimples. Sure, women do go home with the Brad Pitts, but they go home with the Martin Shorts as well.
Women only go for men who are rich: Another misconception that Hollywood has perpetuated is the attraction to wealth. Most women don’t care if you’re a Rockefeller or if your life savings is smaller than the cost of some flat screen televisions. Of course there are exceptions — some women pick their spouses based on the size of their stock portfolio and nothing else. Yet, most women care about how you make them feel way more than how much you just make.
Women only go for men with strong curriculum vitaes: In the movies, the idea behind how to attract women is often directly contingent on success: in film after film, women are seen married to doctors, lawyers, business executives, and Wall Street titans much more often than they are seen married to people with less glorified jobs. In real life, women don’t care about your successes. It might impress them that you own your own car dealership, but dating you isn’t going to be determined by whether or not you own a fleet of Hondas. Rather, they care about how successful you are at loving them.
In the movies, attracting women may involve being rich, successful, and looking like George Clooney. However, back here on earth, attracting women is only contingent on how you treat women. The vast majority of women don’t care if you have an ass that just won’t quit, if your bank account is larger than some governmental budgets, or if you were elected District Attorney at the age of 17 in Doogie Howser fashion. They are only concerned with whether or not you can make them happy. So, make women feel loved, and you’ll be attracting them till long after your credits are rolling.
More dating advice for men on YourTango: