Has your husband lost his sex drive? Here's how to get him back into the mood!
If your once horny husband doesn't want sex anymore, it doesn't mean he's no longer attracted or that he's getting his needs elsewhere...
In fact, if you take a different angle on the issue, it can actually make your relationship better and more passionate then ever!
If your man is “malfunctioning,” try approaching his problem with low sex drive from a logical view point rather than an emotional one. After all, the man is a logical creature and often struggles with emotions. So the best way to figure him out is to try to figure out his motivations and to get a sense of how he's thinking on the matter.
Figure Out the Problem First
Instead of saying something like “my husband doesn't want me,” which can only lead to negative thoughts and emotions, try to answer the more relevant question, which is “Why doesn't he want sex?”
A man could be avoiding sex for any number of reasons, including daily stress, performance anxiety, tiredness or even some relationship tension (often caused by an argument, a previous embarrassment or a lack of trust.)
In some cases, men avoid sex because of health problems or even sexual dysfunction, sometimes caused by a condition that requires immediate medical attention.
Once you determine the reason he is avoiding sex or intimacy, then it's time to figure out ways to gain back his confidence and assuage his fears.
Can you find the point of his stress and relieve some of that tension he's holding inside?
Can you provide comfort to his distressed soul?
Simply showing that you care enough to notice his odd behavior may mean the world to him.
“My Husband Doesn't Want Sex Because He's Bored!”
It can be a bitter "pill" to swallow when you find out that your husband is simply bored of your routine and would rather do nothing than have sex. This isn't the horny guy you remember dating when he was all over you and constantly trying to get inside your pants.
What happened to that guy?
Again, try to avoid filling in the blanks with emotions. It's only natural that partners become accustomed to each other's bodies and routines in the bedroom. This does not indicate contempt, but rather comfort and a level of acceptance.
It's not that your husband doesn't want you, but that he is bored with the routines you have both established over the years. He probably hasn't brought it up because he's afraid of hurting your feelings, or perhaps he hasn't even thought of the idea of spicing up his sex life.
This Is Something You Can Absolutely Fix
Start talking to him about changing up the routine. Don't do it in an accusatory tone, or he might meet this with resistance, defensiveness or even less desire to have sex.
Get Him Excited By Showing Him That You Want Him And You Want To Experiment
Be careful not to overreact if he shares a fantasy or talks about a new fetish he enjoys. The fact that he's being honest with you indicates a high level of trust. Encourage his conversation and the open discussion, even if it's something you would not be comfortable doing.
There are many ways you can have fun with a fantasy without actually endangering your health or marriage by doing something you don't want to do.
The fact that you're exploring these new sexual adventures together will be enough to break the routine and rekindle the flames of your romance.
Also think of new ways to make him feel sexually desired.