Learning how to have an orgasm is surprisingly easy. If you've never had one before, then this guide will show you exactly what you need to do in order to have a powerful, body-shaking orgasm by yourself as well as with your partner. (If you want to learn my best dirty talking tips & techniques for building sexual tension & turning him on, you'll find them in this powerful video)
I have split this tutorial on how to get an orgasm into 2 parts. Both are equally important. In the first part, I am going to explain the things you need to do before you start masturbating or pleasuring yourself so that you are pretty much guaranteed to have a super strong orgasm. Then afterwards, I am going to show you the specific techniques that you need to use to get an orgasm. This is simply because when figuring out how to reach orgasm, whether by yourself or with a man, you need to be able to do 2 things; Put yourself in the right mindset, and know how to physically bring yourself to orgasm.
Alright, let's begin your journey on how to reach orgasm.
1. Go It Alone: Before ever trying to orgasm with your man, you should first start by learning how to have an orgasm on your own. The reason behind this, is that there is a lot less pressure to perform' when you are just by yourself and nobody is watching. Not only should you try to reach orgasm when you are somewhere alone or private, but you should also try to make sure that you are as comfortable as possible. For almost everyone, the place that is both comfortable and a place that is private is their bedroom. But for others, it's the bathroom or even the shower. It's ultimately up to you where your comfortable place is. As well as being in a private, comfortable place, you also need to be able to get yourself in the mood to have an orgasm, which I talk about in the next section.
2. Your Fantasies, Kinks And Turn Ons: To each their own — this phrase is incredibly true and poignant when it comes to what fantasies make you most aroused. Having the best orgasms requires you to intimately know what turns you on and arouses you. So for this part, you need to do a little exploring. You need to start examining what kinds of things turn you on. For many, the classic examples of being with a guy they find hot or being swept off their feet or having sex in front of a roaring fire turns them on and arouses them immensely. However, you'll find that most people have kinks and fantasies that aren't as mainstream as this. These could be things like being dominated by a guy or 2 guys or even a group of guys. Or they could involve things like feet, wearing certain clothes or being degraded. For many women, watching porn is a massive turn on, while others can't stand it. The list is endless. (By the way, if you want to know how to give your man perfect oral sex, you may find this instructional presentation to be very helpful.) The important thing is to find out what turns you on and embrace it. Embracing and getting comfortable with your turn ons and kinks is crucial to learning how to have a powerful orgasm. This is how you set the mood inside your head. Setting the mood outside your head can also be important for some. You may find that lighting candles, dimming the lights, listening to your favorite song, even wearing certain clothes or no clothes at all can help you massively in reaching orgasm. Now on to the fun stuff.
3. Don't Forget About Technique: Ok, so now that we have covered the boring (but still very important) stuff, let's learn some techniques that will help you to have an orgasm.
- Finger Foreplay: This first technique is pretty straightforward. It's designed simply to get you in the mood, which will make building up to having an orgasm a lot easier. All you are going to be doing is running your fingers over your erogenous zones, all over your body and focusing on what feels good. For some they may feel more and more aroused by playing with their nipples between their fingers, while others much prefer to massage their inner thighs and many really like to slowly stroke their labia up and down with their fingers. Play around and discover what you like and enjoy. Remember, the goal here is to focus on what's enjoyable as you are not trying to have an orgasm just yet. Instead, you are just slowly building up.
- Around The Hood: The next place to pay attention to is the clitoral hood. This is the small flap of skin that covers your clitoris. While the final aim is obviously to learn how to achieve orgasm, keeping focusing only on what feels good. Don't get caught up with the orgasm part just yet. You may like to very lightly brush and stroke over the clitoral hood, while others may like much more forceful pressure. At the end of the day, it's really up to you. So experiment with different amounts of pressure until you discover what's most pleasureable. If you want to know how to talk dirty to your man, then I strongly advise you to watch this video with examples.
- Direct Stimulation: Once you are really enjoying yourself, then it's time to discover the secret of how to have an orgasm while masturbating. The easiest way is with direct stimulation with the tips of your fingers on your clitoris. All you need to do is simply rub your clitoris with either a side-to-side motion or an up-and-down motion or a circular motion. Start by experimenting with only the lightest amount of pressure and then slowly increase the amount of pressure that you apply. As you do, try to note how good (or bad) it feels. Then just concentrate on what feels best as this will help you to get an orgasm. Having an orgasm this way is called a clitoral orgasm.
4. Focus On The Fun, Not The Outcome: When learning how to have an orgasm on your own, you need to follow one piece of counter-intuitive advice. And that is do not focus on trying to get an orgasm. Just focus on what feels good and pleasurable and eventually that feeling will build to an orgasm. Maybe not the first time you try it, but eventually.
5. Don't Forget To Bring Your Man In On The Action: Once you know how to reach orgasm on your own, it's time to get your man involved. If you find that you are struggling to reach orgasm during sex, you can show your man what you like or you can just do what works by yourself during sex to bring you closer to orgasm.
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