Mastering The Struggle Of Midlife Dating


Mastering The Struggle Of Midlife Dating
Frustrated with the quality of men you're meeting online? Try a new approach!

A few years ago, I found myself frustrated with the quality of men I was meeting online. If you keep doing the same thing, you’ll keep getting the same results; according to Einstein, that’s the definition of insanity. Einstein also said, "It's not that I'm so smart; it's just that I stay with problems longer." So, I sat with this problem, and came up with a new solution.

What about being fixed up? Setups can be a great way to meet your match, but in midlife, it’s not so easy. Only a few of my friends and family were setting me up, and the dates were not very compatible. You’ve probably experienced something similar. Your friends say, "I think you’re amazing. I wish I knew a great guy to set you up with. But, unfortunately, I don’t know anyone."


So, I decided to try something based loosely on what I learned from dating coach/matchmaker/author Rachel Greenwald. I asked for a setup with a twist. I sent out an email campaign to friends and family, asking them to set me up with people they knew. I got mixed responses (some people thought I was nuts/strange/outrageous), but I did get set up on some wonderful dates.

Email Campaign for Setups:


I hope you are well. As you may know, I have been actively dating for about two years since my divorce. I have met some wonderful men (and some not-so-wonderful men). I have dated men that I’ve met online and offline, through set-ups and at social events.

Lately, I have found dating to be quite frustrating. I am ready for a long-term committed relationship. I’d like to eventually get married again and get it ‘right’ this time. As a dating coach, I advise my clients to try many avenues to find the right guy, so I’ve decided to try something new. And for that, I need your help.

I am writing you because you are an important person in my life, and I believe you are connected to some wonderful people. You probably know many men I don’t know. Do you work out at a gym? Do you take classes with smart single men? Do you work with a nice guy who might be a good fit for me?

Would you be willing to think about men between the ages of 47 and 65, who might fit the type that I’ve outlined in my online dating profile below? I am not looking for a ‘single man meets single woman because they’re both single’ kind of fix-up, but one where we’re truly well suited for each other.

I have attached my profile, with the hope that it will give you a better idea about what types of qualities and values are important to me. I am hoping you will forward it to the right man. Who knows? With your help, perhaps I’ll be able to find Mr. Right.

One more thing: If you help me find him, you will be generously rewarded. The right man is worth his weight in gold to me.

Thank you for any help you may provide in helping me find my guy.

With love,
Sandy Keep reading...

More dating coach adive on YourTango:

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Sandy Weiner

Dating Coach

Sandy Weiner

For a copy of my FREE report, “The Top Three Mistakes Midlife Daters Make (and how to turn them around to find love now)” please click here.

If you are serious about finding love this year, there’s nothing like group coaching to keep you accountable and give you solid dating tools that work. In the Last First Date Inner Circle, you'll have access to two monthly topic-based Q & A calls about dating over 40, and a private forum for you to connect and share your experiences. All calls are recorded and transcribed, and you get a free chapter a month of my upcoming book. If you're a woman over 40 and want ongoing coaching support at an affordable rate, check out the LFD Inner Circle today. 

Location: Stamford, CT
Credentials: ACC, CPCC
Specialties: Dating/Being Single Support, Empowering Women, Online Dating
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