Let's be honest. Manti Te'o and your stalker please leave the news headlines. I'm sure Manti would appreciate that. And as for the confused Ronaiah Tuiasosopo, while molestation may have led to some of your actions, being gay is in the DNA and not to be compared to a "drug addiction." If you want to be cured then go to a liars anonymous group to be healed or continue to chat with Dr. Phil because he's bound to get you straightened out.
On the professional spectrum of football, you've got Chris Culliver, cornerback of the San Francisco 49ers, desperately in need of sensitivity training after his derogatory statements against gay people. However, his loose lips — and a few too many tackles without a helmet — led to a defensive lineup including Ray Edwards (Atlanta Falcons), Eric Decker (Denver Broncos), Chris Kluwe (Minnesota Vikings), George Wilson (Buffalo Bills) and Rob Gronkowski (New England Patriots) to take a stance for gay rights (See the whole story at Gay.net). I say we give these handsome hunks, plus the rest of the guys featured in the story, a proper fabulous-gay-snap for being men enough to say, "I'm okay with dropping my drawers in the locker room with ya!"
Regardless of the stories and where they generated from the messages still seems to be that homosexuality is a sickness that can be cured and that we're all pedophiles. Well sport fans, that play has been run too many times and it still doesn't lead to a touchdown or a national title. In fact, if you're buying into that scenario then you, like Culliver, are suffering from a game day hangover, forgot to wear your own helmet because you thought you could take a hit or drank from the cooler filled with bigoted, imbecile and inhumane juice.
No matter what you think, homosexuality is not a sickness or curable. It's just another way of being human. How do I know?
- I've sensed my attraction to males since the age of three or four, when I was old enough to realize that what was between my legs was different than what was between my best friend Jennifer's legs. And no, I wasn't playing doctor. We used to change into our swimsuits together with our mothers supervision before we went sliding down the slip-and-slide in the backyard.
- As soon as I hit puberty I wanted to be with my best friend, a very handsome, mustached, hairy-chested and well-endowed young man. Before that I used to imagine kissing my best friend who was slightly effeminate but very sweet. Then in college it was the guy down the hall from me with the sweet smile, the dorky nerd with the cute bubble butt and who could forget the blond, curly-haired guy in theater. All of these guys sent my radar knocking before I knew what gaydar even was.
- I'm not an ex-gay survivor. However, I did enter into some religious "therapy" when I came out in college. I'm glad I did because at that time the HIV/AIDS epidemic was still a mystery and had I come out then who knows if I'd be here to write this article. Discussions with the college pastor, at the heavy-handed and loving urging of my parents, led me to believe I needed to change my ways and draw into my religious foundations. He was brilliant, insightful and compassionate. All the things I needed to move forward and get myself on track. The only problem was that at the end of each session I much rather would have gone home with the handsome pastor then back to my dorm room to try to hide my true self.
- My heart aches when I think about going back to pretending to be straight just to please everyone else. I was miserable and unhappy. Like many people, maybe even you, I lived in the shell of an existence. I was married with kids but that wasn't really me. Does that sound like how you want to live? I didn't think so. That pretty much explains why choosing to be gay just isn't an option; misery really doesn't love company.
- Contrary to popular and misguided belief homosexuality isn't all about sex. If you read and believe everything you see, gays and lesbians live on the island of orgy but in reality we also live in homes, have children, hold down jobs, sit and watch TV and suffer through bouts of intimacy deprivation with our partners.
At the end of the day the one thing I know for me and the estimated four million gays and lesbians in the United States (not counting the other millions around the globe) is that we're human and we were born this way. All you have to do is take the religion out of the discussion and what do you end up with? A friendly game of football.
Rick Clemons, The Coming Out Coach
Certified Professional Coach (CPC), Energy Leader Index, Master Practioner (ELI-MP)
Rick Clemons is a Certified Professional Coach who's been featured on The Ricki Lake Show, and is a highly sought after radio show guest, blogger, author and Sex Coach U Faculty Member, who lovingly addresses the many facets of Coming Out for all who are touched by this Journey. Rick also hosts his own radio show, The Coming Out Lounge.
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