The Way To Relating, Part 4: Love Versus Possession
By Ph.D. Sherrie Campbell. Posted on .
This is the 4th article in a series of five discussing natural emotions and their unnatural counterparts. Any time our natural emotions are repressed they create unnatural reactions and responses. The natural emotions are repressed in the majority of people. Our emotions are our gifts, our friends and allies. They are our soul representatives. They represent the world of each person’s private inner life. Because emotions are universal we best relate to each other on the level of the emotions. The best way to have productive communication is to come from our natural emotions. We do not need to become better communicators. We need to be in touch with our natural responses and relate to the other from how we feel. The natural emotions are never violent, threatening, crazy-making or controlling.
Violence, circular fighting, stonewalling, and not listening is what most people call communication. Our first emotions represent our truth. Our secondary emotions represent our defenses. Our first emotions show up in open discussions, our secondary emotions end up in non-productive fighting. Our first emotions allow each partner to be smart and understood. They allow our discussions to grow and for each person to learn more about the other. Our secondary emotions create a right and wrong platform where no one is heard and each person looks crazy. Understanding is halted with the use of the secondary emotions.
This article is going to discuss love and its fixed counterpart, possessiveness. Love is our most consistent and present natural emotion. Love is the first emotion we experience. Love is also our most powerful emotion. When love is allowed to be expressed we feel free within. Love is the natural expression of who we really are, and is the one emotion that brings us all together. When a natural disaster occurs it is love that unites the world. No other emotion has this power. Love unites and branches off into other emotions such as compassion, tolerance, forgiveness, understanding, softness and mutuality.
