Get your own freedom, wives of the world!
It sounds easy: If you get most women in a corner these days, we’d admit to one another that it’s smart to eschew those June Cleaver days of old whereby a 1950s-era wife relied on her husband for an allowance.
“Always have your own money on the side,” both older and younger women repeat to one another like an edict.
I grew up in a time when it was normal for women to work in corporate America, and that’s what I did throughout most of the 1980s and 1990s. But then our little bundle of blessings named Cameron came along in 2001, and no matter how many daycare centers we visited, I had no desire to leave my child in the care of a leather-jacket-clad daycare worker.
Seriously. Leather jackets. Who wants that holding their baby?
So soon enough, I found myself in a decidedly Leave It to Beaver spot. I became a stay-at-home mom who ended up relying on her husband’s income.
Thank God for giving me a good guy so this situation can work, yet it gave me so much insight about what it's like to NOT have your own money.
1. Money gives you two things, first and foremost: power and respect.
They say money equals power. While I believe there exist more powerful entities than money, I do agree that having a boatload of money can give you more options.
For example, if you see Las Vegas cars for sale, have the money or credit available to buy one and it doesn’t hurt the household budget, that’s one less hurdle. Compared to a home in which a wife must “ask” the husband for permission to use “his” money all the time, you'll feel so much more empowered.
2. Money fosters a creative outlet.
Plenty of us women have delved into our own home-based businesses whilst raising kids and discovered part-time hobbies can not only bring in money, but also help us express ourselves in creative ways.
3. Money leads to runaway success.
Who hasn’t heard of those miraculous stories of women simply looking to make a little extra income on the side that turns them into the next Mrs. Field’s baker-type?
4. Money gives you freedom.
There is a level of freedom from checking your bank account balances and witnessing the fact that you have enough funds to fill up the gas tank, shop for groceries and buy beauty products when the mood strikes.
5. Money instills you with confidence.
With earning your own income comes a measure of confidence that might be lacking otherwise. There’s something special about knowing you have the skills to pay the bills.
6. Money takes codependency out of your marriage.
At least if you’re making enough money to survive on your own but still want to remain married to your husband—that’s a good indication that you’re not just staying with him for his income.
7. Money lets you hang out with your other friends.
Of course, some folks use money in bad ways as a source of control. Thank goodness for the great husbands and wives who don’t lord their breadwinning ways over their spouses. But the ones who do oftentimes use it as an excuse to deny the activities they don’t want their mates to enjoy.
This lack of funds covers up a much darker issue.
That’s why it helps to “earn our own keep,” be altruistic, and marry those who are generous and kind.