The Ins & Outs Of Texting & Dating

Are you single? Find out how to use text messages to your best advantage!

The Ins & Outs Of Texting & Dating [EXPERT]
Advertisement

The hierarchy of dating communication goes as follows: text message, chat, email, phone call. Text is largely considered the lowest level in the food chain of communication. Although, arguably, Facebook chat is lower. I mean, at least you need someone's cell phone number in order to text, right?

Yet, I love texting. It is quick, efficient and concise, and I am rarely concise, just ask my husband. I once told a friend who was editing an interview of mine that I am better when edited, and he wisely said "Everyone's better when edited."

Advertisement

Text messages force me to edit myself and I appreciate that. Harvard Magazine reported that young people say phone conversations slow them down. I agree. Yet, many women feel that it is rude to text rather than call somene you're dating. But who has time for all this calling? Who knows how to win at a game of phone tag these days? I sure don't.

These "phone-o-philes" think that they are standing up for healthy communication and a true connection with someone else. They often have quite a moral high ground about it. I find their superiority complex on this topic to be unwarranted. The era of the phone call has ended. This battle has already been lost. 

Advertisement

I see texting as men's revenge. The phone call era gave rise to a lot of annoyed men and the phrase "chewing my ear off." Many of these men were pretty keen on technology, and thus the text was born. 7 Subtle Flirting Mistakes Even The Savviest Women Make

Texting takes back the night on communication between men and women in dating. It is true you can be doing five other things while you are texting. You might even be on a date with another girl, but at least you can tolerate listening when the message is under 160 characters and on your terms. However, is that good for relationships? No way. Matchmaker Reveals 5 Crazy-But-Powerful Ways To Magnetically Attract Men

Ladies, we cannot allow the technology-driven, non-verbal single men to be the CEOs of communication in dating. But, if you cannot beat them, join them. Embrace texting, but use it wisely. Be funny, flirty, smart, quirky and hard-to-get.

More dating advice from YourTango: 

Advertisement

Don't ever make your text roll over to page two. Even if you are on an iPhone, this makes your talk bubble big. Be cute, coy and fun. But most of all, use it as a means to an end, not an end in itself.

Text is designed for making plans and coordinating schedules, or at least it is best used for that purpose in dating. Use texting as a teaser to get a date set up. If a date is not using it that way, then you are a condiment to him. Meaning, he wants to keep you around in the refrigerator for when he needs you, like ketchup. Don't be ketchup.

Be the main course. Call me old fashioned, but I believe in the highest form of communication — meeting in person. That is why Matchmaker Café focuses on setting up real dates at a real Café. We use technology, but it is only to make the live meeting happen more efficiently.

You have to meet to know if there is chemistry. You have to have dates to get to know each other better. That is what never goes out of style. Sexting might be stimulating, but not nearly as much as actual sex10 Ways People Screw Up First Dates Without Even Realizing It

Advertisement

So, move up the food chain in dating communication and be as bold as you can!