If you have been single for an extended period, it is common to have a variety of thoughts regarding why you have not met Mr. Right.
Have any of these thoughts crossed your mind?
- I need to move to another city (state, country) because no one I meet here fits my criteria for love.
- All the great guys I am attracted to are already married or committed to someone else.
- My life is hectic and I find it difficult to fit a social life into my schedule.
- I just want to meet someone nice, get married and have a family. I do not have time to search all over the place for him.
While you can attend endless singles oriented functions, join multiple online dating services and hit up your friends for introductions, the primary key to meeting the love of your life is your emotional readiness. Before you can meet Mr. Right, you need to make up your mind that you are okay with him walking into your life.
As a relationship coach, I know how easy it is for singles to mentally say they are ready for love, but not open hearted for that experience. Before you pack your bags, quit your job or make any type of drastic lifestyle change, consider implementing these strategies first:
Be Emotionally Available
Most people know when they hang their "unavailable" sign to others. It’s the person who walks through the day with a look that says, "Don't even think about talking to me!" Any attitude that puts up a barrier is a sure fire way to stay single. Leave the phone in your purse and the headphones at home and start being friendly. Open multiple opportunities for love through your daily life by letting go of self-focus and engage in the moment with the people around you. Practice making eye contact, smile at others and engage in light small talk when the opportunity arises.
Know What You Want
When it comes to describing the type of person you desire to date, it's easy to draw a blank or just a vague outline. It is not unromantic to know what you want in love. The right one will not get away if you have a detailed description. Unless you are cognizant of the experience you desire in love, you will not even see Mr. Right. The dating experience can either be an aimless exercise with a cloudy vision, dating people who just happen into your life or you can be proactive and figure out what qualities and characteristics are most important to you in lasting love.
Have Realistic Expectations
Making an unattainable list for your Mr. Right will not draw you closer to that goal. The key highlights should include:
- Is this a person of integrity?
- Do we share primary life and relationship goals?
- Are we really compatible and do we share the basic priorities in life?
It is vital to look beyond physical attraction and chemistry requirements and visualize what type of relationship experience will bring the most fulfillment to you in a lasting relationship.