This thing scares men away in a HUGE way.
If you've had one guy you met through online dating to unexplainably disappear — no biggie. But if two or more guys you were corresponding with mysteriously evaporated — Virginia, you may have a personal problem.
The number one issue that I see that sabotages women's dating and relationship efforts is: they are dragging the baggage of a past hurtful relationship.
Their ex-boyfriend or ex-husband was unfaithful, shiftless or abusive, and so they lump all men into a cauldron of liars, cheaters and assholes. They say things like, "I'm not going to put up with a man's crap! I don't trust men. I like my life, I don't have to have a man."
My client Leila's repeated comment was, "How long does it take for a man to show his true side?"
A woman who has a "chip on her shoulder" is constantly on the subliminal defense. Her statements express how tough, how capable, how intelligent, and how independent she is. Others see her as narrow-minded, disagreeable and argumentative.
Conversations with this kind of woman are draining, gloomy and non-productive. She contributes to your conversation with her highly opinionated comments. She counters your comments with her combative point of views.
She rebuffs your constructive criticism, turning it back on you, saying, "Well, you do the same thing." If you say black, she says, "Oh, white is a much better color." You grow to expect her negativity, and you learn to withhold your opinions.
If you have a "chip on your shoulder," your girlfriends may love you unconditionally, but your online man will read between the email lines, decide you have a negative attitude — and he will vanish into cyberspace.
Leila corresponded with three online guys. Two of them silently disappeared after a round of email exchanges. She met the third guy for dinner. Leila felt their first date went "okay," but two days later, he texted her, saying, they were not a match.
This article was originally published at http://www.knowitallnancy.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.