I was recently at an event giving tips on how to improve your date night when I met a woman who, without a hint of a smile, said “I don’t need any tips about dates, I have a husband”. Her lack of happy glow, disregard for evolving romance, and general gloominess served to remind me of the reasons I continue to recommend creative date nights to long term couples. We all need to put energy in re-connecting, re-discovering each other, and reminding ourselves that we are desirable and worth dating. Here are some ideas to try soon.
Escape from the practical : Remember that date night should be about fun and connection. Make a commitment to leave topics like the kids, bill paying, chores and to–do lists off the table for the night. Reach deeper into your mind and talk about things that interest you, wild dreams for the future, and, of course, things that make you laugh. What would you share with a new person in your life? What would you want someone to know about you as you are today?
I’ll show you Mine, You show me yours : No, not that kind of date - although we get that later. For this date have a movie double feature when each of you brings a movie that was important to you in your adolescence. Cuddle in with popcorn or snacks you liked as kids (perhaps coolranch doritos, for us children of the 80s). Take time after each movie to reminise, talk about what the movie means to you now, what you learned from it, or even funny stories about how you tried to imitate it. Get to know each other’s teenage self just a little bit.
Undiscovered territory : Take turns introducing something completely new to both of you. This can be as simple as trying a new food, taking a class in something neither of you have tried, or listening to a new song. This date gets better as you keep going as it inspires both of you to be creative and bring new excitement to the relationship. Remember you don’t have to like the new things you discover. Laughing about an inedible meal or an awkward evening can be part of the bonding.