Dr. Marty Klein - Author, Sex Therapist, Speaker/Presenter, YourTango Expert Partner - Palo Alto, CA
Advanced Member

Dr. Marty Klein (MFT,PhD)

Author

Contact information

Email me

Phone 650/856-6533

Fax: 650/858-1848

2439 Birch Street

Palo Alto, CA Show on map

My Website

I've done over 30,000 counseling sessions with men, women, and couples. I’ve learned that everyone wants to be sexually normal, and too many people are afraid they aren’t.  And while people say that what they most want from sex is pleasure and closeness, during sex they usually focus on other things—how they look, smell, and sound; what their penis or vulva is doing (rather than how it feels); and how they imagine they compare with other men or other women in bed. Absolutely none of that gives people the nourishment they want from sex.

Along the way, I’ve written 5 books, hundreds of magazine articles, and an award-winning blog.

I remind readers that sex doesn’t equal intercourse. I tell people it’s OK to wear socks in bed if their feet are cold. I say orgasm is not the best or most important part of sex—and I warn women and men against faking it. I advise people to open the condom wrapper before their hands get slippery, and I insist they keep their lubricant in the bedroom, not the bathroom—unless, of course, they usually have sex in the bathroom.

But no matter where I go, and no matter how much I write, I always come back to my patients. About half have sexual difficulties, such as problems with erection, orgasm, lubrication, scary fantasies, desire (too low, too high, or too weird), painful sex (both women and men), affairs (their own or their partner’s), and the current problem-du-jour, internet pornography. Of course, when people have sexual problems, shame, guilt, and anger are never far away.

The other half of my patients bring in the rest of humanity’s woes—problems with kids, in-laws, money, drinking, and that all-purpose description, communication problems.

My style as a therapist is eclectic. I’m extremely flexible, because every patient is different. Some need information; some need compassion; some need tough love; some need a little teasing to lighten them up (none of us is getting out of this life alive, right?  ); some need to take their own needs more seriously (generally after getting to know them better); and some people just need help growing up.

I look forward to working with you on YourTango.com. Just don’t expect a lot of simple advice that you’re already getting from your friends or relatives. And don’t expect a lot of advice about what to do with those few inches between your legs.

After all, sex isn’t just an activity—it’s an idea. So we’ll mostly talk about your sexual ideas—which will shape your activities, and improve your satisfaction immensely.

Find more sex advice here.

The Reason I Became A Helping Professional

“Didn’t we see you here at the clinic a few months ago? And didn’t we fit you for a diaphragm? Uh-huh. So I wonder how come you’re back now for a pregnancy test.”

That’s how my career in sexuality started. I was a volunteer counselor at a family planning clinic, talking with women and couples coming in for pregnancy tests. I kept noticing that a lot of these women had been prescribed birth control pills, fitted for diaphragms, or sent home with condoms—and now they were afraid they were pregnant.

People weren’t using the supplies we gave them.

The reason was usually the same: “I didn’t want my boyfriend to think I was a slut.” Or “I didn’t want a new guy thinking I was hoping for sex.” That’s when I realized that there’s more to family planning than products and services. There’s sexuality—and the feelings, misinformation, and stereotypes that shape our sexual choices.

So I became a sex therapist. I became a marriage & family therapist. I became a passionate advocate for sexuality education. And now I’m here with you.
 

Dr. Marty Klein

Additional Details

Dr. Marty Klein

Payment Options

Accepts Credit Cards:

Yes

Accepts Insurance:

No

Accepts Paypal:

Yes

Sliding Scale:

No

Fee Range:

Over $120 per session

Dr. Marty Klein

Quick Stats

Main Specialty:

Couples/Marital Issues

Infidelity / Affair Recovery

Sexuality

Credentials:

MFT, PhD

Time in Practice:

25 years +

I practice in:

My state/province only

Additional Expertise:

Sex Therapist

Speaker/Presenter

YourTango Expert Partner

I offer my services:

At my office

I am fluent in:

English

Licence information:

Expiration 10/31/14
Number MX15392

Articles by Dr. Marty Klein
Retail Therapy

What Do People Want To Know About Sex?

Better sex isn't about what the bodies do, it's about how the people feel.

flirting

Symptoms of Sex Addiction? No

What some people call "sex addiction" may be perfectly ordinary sexuality.

emotional intimacy is the key to better sex

Emotional Intimacy: How Being Vulnerable Can Lead To Red-Hot Sex

Challenge #11: Let down your guard with your partner.

cartoon kiss

5 Sex Habits To Break Before The New Year

Some habits actually undermine your sex life. Here are a few examples.

Why You Shouldn't Have Sex Over The Holidays [EXPERT]

Why You Shouldn't Have Sex Over The Holidays

5 reasons to keep your love life PG this holiday season despite temptation.

Check Out My New Book
America's War on Sex: The Continuing Attack on Law, Lust, and Liberty (Sex, Love, and Psychology)
Americans are more vulnerable today than ever ...
By Marty Klein
BUY
America's War on Sex: The Attack on Law, Lust and Liberty (Sex, Love, and Psychology)
President George W. Bush says that, In our ...
By Marty Klein
BUY
Ask Me Anything: A Sex Therapist Answers the Most Important Questions for the '90s
Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex--and How to Get It
Beyond Orgasm: Dare to Be Honest about the Sex You Really Want

Dr. Marty Klein

All Specialties

Couples/Marital Issues, Infidelity / Affair Recovery, Sexuality