Are you overlooking his negative qualities just because he's hot?
Last week, Time published the latest study done by the International Association for Relationship Research.The study hints that "a woman’s relationship status can make her immune to a man she might otherwise find good-looking." It seems that women in the study tended to find flaws in good-looking men as long as they were not dating them. That is surely good news for boyfriends and husbands everywhere.
However, I would like to present to you another study: the one done by yours truly over the years of coaching both men and women on the art of dating and relationships. That study shows that, sadly, the better looking the guy, the more his girlfriend closed her eyes to his indiscretions. Furthermore, many women admitted to me that they fully understood that they were giving their men free passes based solely on their looks. The logic held was that if a woman berated a good-looking man, he could easily exchange her for someone else who didn't; as opposed to an average guy who would put up with rebukes because there was no line of women waiting to date him.
Sadly, some of these women eventually end up marrying these boyfriends. Many end up as subservient wives who cater to their husbands' whims and instead of speaking up when issues escalate, drive themselves to drink and/or into depression.
So how can you tell if you are overly indulgent with your attractive boyfriend?
- Do you find yourself being grateful that he is your boyfriend?
- Are you continuously making excuses to yourself, as well as others, for his behavior?
- Do you find yourself continuously worried about what would happen if you disagreed with him?
- In an argument, do you eventually come to "see things his way," even if you started out on polar opposite sides of the issue?
- Do you find yourself changing your image to imitate that of a woman you saw him eyeing at a party?
- When you color your hair, buy a new dress or lingerie, do you not let yourself enjoy it until you hear his opinion?
- Do you use the phrase "boys will be boys" on regular basis when referring to your boyfriend's bad behavior?
- Are you gravely afraid to think of what would happen if he left you?
- When your boyfriend is rude to you, do you change the subject or leave instead of confronting him?
- Have you ever agreed with people who said "he is too good-looking for you"?
If you answered "yes" to 5 or more of these questions, you may be a victim of your boyfriend's good looks. Ask yourself the following: 30 years from now, when his good looks fade, will you still wish to remain the object of his insolence and disrespect?