What gives stars their power? The obvious answer is the constant feed of attention and, often, adoration coming from fans. But if we take a closer look, we'll see that stars have power before they have fame. We hear stories of agents and other people in the business recognizing "star" quality in a person before anyone even knows their name. So what exactly is star power? Star power is a mixture of four elements that come together to form a potent presence that's palpable to the rest of us. The good news is that anyone can cultivate star power even when you're in the business of banking or fashion. This powerful presence pays off in every arena, as it gets you noticed and keeps others interested.
The four elements of star power are unapologetic confidence, fearless self-expression, authentic humility and instinctive boundaries.
- Unapologetic Confidence: I once saw Jennifer Aniston on the Oprah show. Oprah mentioned something about Aniston looking the best she's ever looked and Aniston replied with a simple and gracious, "Thanks, I feel good!" She received the compliment. She didn't bounce it back with a flippant, "You too!" This kind of unapologetic self-confidence comes from a lack of self-rejection. Stars know that they aren't perfect, but they don't reject pieces of themselves either. Self-rejection takes energy and therefore diminishes a powerful presence. Stars often engage in self-depreciating humor, but it's just that, humor. Those with real star power know who they are and accept it whole-heartedly.
- Fearless Self-Expression: Do stars have fear? Of course. Everyone has fear, but stars have something greater than fear, and that is passion. They are fearless because they express themselves in the midst of fear. They don't wait for it to go away. The light that shines from someone who's willing to share his or her gifts despite experiencing normal "stage fright" is bright indeed. Take a lesson from the stars, and cultivate your passion to the point that it outweighs your fear. Then watch others as they admire your courage.
- Authentic Humility: Let's face it. No one likes an ego with arms and legs. Sure, a healthy ego is fine and may be necessary to rise to the top, but it's authentic humility that connects us with others. We feel that they are real and relatable and we feel good about ourselves when we're around them. We can all benefit from a solid dose of humility that comes from being aware of our fundamental humanness. Sure, we may be on top now, but that could change in a heartbeat. Everyone is valuable, and in the end, we're all human.
- Instinctive Boundaries: Stars must protect themselves when they're on the rise. Here's why. Everyone and their mother will try to bring them down. Humans are like a pack of dogs vying for the alpha position. When someone threatens to rise above the rest, it can get ugly. Stars instinctively know how to ignore the negative words, deeds and vibes coming from others. They surround themselves with people who love them enough to let them shine like the sun and then some.
If you want to have star power, cultivate these four elements. Fake it 'til you make it if you must, but eventually you will start to master this blend of effortless confidence that gets, and keeps, you noticed.
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