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3 Ways Your Social Media Habit Is KILLING Your Self-Esteem

girl on computer

Disconnect! STOP Spending So Much Time On Social Media For This Important Reason.

Every time you feel hurt, guilty, not good enough or upset about your life, body or relationship by comparing yourself to other people on social media, your self-esteem takes a hit.

Although it’s empowering to connect with the world with the click of a virtual button, it can be just as quick and easy to discover more ways you are not who or where you want to be yet, and that can feel absolutely terrible.

Feeling inspired and positively fired up by social media is great, but if you’re feeling dragged down by it, know that it has more of a negative impact than you realize.  

Your self-esteem is a puzzle with three fragile pieces. If any piece is bent, broken or wadded up, your puzzle is incomplete and your self-esteem suffers… and that impacts every area of your life, every second of your day. Yes, it IS that big of deal.

Self-Esteem Puzzle Pieces:

1. Self-confidence – how you feel about yourself

2. Self-respect – what you think of yourself

3. Self-image – how you see yourself

Damaging Social Media Habits:

1. Comparing your body to someone slimmer, more fit, or more attractive than you damages your self-image.

The Odyssey

You need to feel good in your own skin. It’s completely possible for you to feel healthy, happy and whole even if you don’t look like a magazine cover model.

Stop comparing yourself by saying, “That’s for me,” when you see something you like or want. Your subconscious mind loves direct requests so it can magnetize those things into your life.

Look at it like you’re ordering food in a restaurant. You don’t just say, “Bring me dinner.” You order what you want specifically and that’s what you get.

2. Flirting or posting online to gain attention or acceptance instead of nurturing your real, personal relationships decreases your self-respect.


If your gut feeling tells you it’s wrong, it’s wrong, so stop doing it. Social media gets your basic psychological need for connection met very quickly but often at the cost of a healthy relationship with yourself and your partner and family – the real connections you need.

You can feel connected, energized, and empowered to be the woman you’re meant to be. There’s no need to settle for virtual, global acceptance or superficial drama delivered conveniently 24/7 to your phone. You deserve better.

3. Feeling less than when you see someone who is more talented, doing a better job, or getting more business, money, or accolades than you can drop your self-confidence like a rock.


Self-confidence is how YOU feel about you. Anything that makes you different or unique is where your power lies. Get to know who you are, what you believe, your values, and what you bring to the table. Your self-acceptance is more precious than anyone else’s opinion of you will ever be. Ever.  

Of course there are the posts that feel good too. All of the kindness, rescue, positive quote posts can really boost your mood and attitude. However, mixed in with those uplifting messages are the ones that cut, burn, and hurt and one of your social media habits needs to be enforcing strong boundaries.

Yes, other people can post and say what they want, just like you can. But if you are connected to someone who regularly offends or lowers your mood, disconnect from them. They are not an energetic fit for you. Like in a relationship, sometimes, you just don’t feel the chemistry you’re looking for.

Kelly Rudolph is a Confidence Coach and founder of Positive Women Rock. She gives women the tools to get from stuck and stressed to clear and confident. Connect with her and get her free Life Strategies at





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