When single girls get together on Valentine's Day, the conversation is usually centered on one or more of these three topics:
Pretending they are okay with being single even though they're not.
Male-bashing because they think men are the problem.
Watching romance movies and wishing they were in a relationship or wondering if they will ever have "movie-love."
I would like to suggest a more positive, fun and certainly more empowering option for a Valentine's Day Gal-Pal Get-Together. One that feels better, brings out the best in you, and celebrates men, women, relationships and a great future. Are you ready?
Valentine's Day is about all about love and can include friends, family, co-workers or anyone else whose day you'd like to brighten.
Although it can be magical to be in a great relationship on this heart-shaped holiday, all too often the pressure it places on couples spawns fights, break-ups and bad memories. The prospect of disappointing someone you care about or just started seeing, inspires anxiety and can take its toll on a fun-filled day and evening.
When you're single, you get to determine how you experience Valentine's Day and you may surprise yourself by making it your best one yet. So, get some upbeat girlfriends together who want to have fun and make some great memories instead of commiserating and male-bashing.
Let me get scientific with you for a moment: the law of physics never changes; we get what we focus on. With this in mind, the best way to make Valentine's Day (or any day) a positive experience is to think about and focus on what you want rather than what you don't want. We're so programmed to think about, talk about and focus on what we don't want and don't like that this may take a little practice, but is well worth the effort.
Here's an example of how adjusting perspectives can dramatically impact your future. Maybe you are wishing you were in a relationship and spending your Valentine's Day with a special someone who you will happily be with for many years to come, but you're not. Rather than focusing on the fact that you're not, use your imagination to create a great picture of your ideal relationship and focus your attention on how it feels to already have it.
Sound silly? That's why most people don't do it even once much less consistently enough to stay in the high-frequency vibration that will draw it to them. Yes, I said "High-frequency vibration," and here's what I mean. The law of vibration is one of seven universal laws that keep the universe running smoothly and are in effect 24/7 whether we believe it or not.
But all that science aside, here's what you need to know. Your words, thoughts and emotions have creative energy in them, either positive or negative. That energy attracts similar energy. If you focus on negative or painful things like an ex who mistreated you, you'll be attracting more men who mistreat women.
If you focus on your ideal relationship, career move, physical health, etc., consistently — switching your focus when you feel yourself getting negative — you'll begin to attract those great things because of the law of vibration.
I know, we should have learned this in school instead of learning how to add up letters to equal numbers but we didn't, so now is the perfect time and Valentine's Day is the perfect day to practice.
This Valentine's Day, get together with upbeat girlfriends and play make-believe. We loved it as kids until somebody told us it was stupid, right? Or maybe we were daydreaming and a parent or teacher told us to stop and pay attention. I'm asking you to awaken your imagination and visualize what you really, really want, whether it's a relationship or something else. Here's what you do…
Example #1: One girlfriend imagines her dream job or a huge career move, feeling what it's like to already have it. She tells all of you how it smells to be sitting in a beautiful restaurant with business associates and how the food tastes even better than she imagined. Or how the ocean breeze feels in her hair on the vacation she easily affords after landing her biggest client yet.
She tells you what she's wearing and how fit and spectacular she feels in her clothes. Or how she feels when people tell her that her eyes sparkle when she talks about the impact she's making in the world. Ask her what kind of car she drives or how it feels to pet her cat on her balcony overlooking the ocean or mountains. Take turns creating your ideal future in your imagination. Some personality styles may take a bit more practice. You can learn about personality styles here, in my free download.
Example #2: Let's say you want an excellent relationship with the man of your dreams. Imagine what it feels like to be holding hands with him as you walk on the beach or in the woods. What does your hand feel like in his? How does he smell? What's the look on your face? How do you feel about him? What are you both wearing? How do you feel when people see you together?
Notice the wind in your hair. How would you describe it? You stop to get a bite to eat. What do you order? How does it taste? Does he sit across from you or next to you? How do you feel when you look into his eyes? How does it feel to be adored by this man? What kind of music is playing in the background? What do you see outside the window? Do you have a family with him? How long have you been together?
What kinds of things do you like to do together? How does it feel to hold him in your arms and feel protected and loved for who you truly are? How much does your heart flutter when you kiss? How do his hands feel on your skin? How does his body feel to you when you massage him? How do you feel when you see his eyes sparkle as he looks at you? Shall I go on or do you get the picture — literally? Include all of your senses in this visualization and remember, feeling is a powerful creative energy.
There are a few important things to remember as you do this so I've put together a checklist for you that you can grab free here. Since you're learning to use all of this fantastic high-frequency, creative energy, you'll want to do it correctly.
When you get together with your positive girlfriends on Valentine's Day, take turns closing your eyes, imagining, and telling your friends what is going on in your ideal vision of what you want. If one of you gets stuck, ask questions like, "How do you feel being there?" or "What do you see?" Encourage her to look around in her vision and always bring it back to feeling; how does she feel. Emotion is the strongest creator and you have just learned how to create intentionally.
Practicing your visualization with emotion is very strong creative energy and each time you do it, add in more details you want in your life, romance, partner or self. Practice makes you better while try makes you doubt. So, practice, practice, practice.
Let me know how it goes and how you feel afterward. Remember that the law of physics never changes. We get what we focus on. Doesn't it feel great to focus on exactly what you want?
Kelly Rudolph is a Certified Life Coach, Hypnotherapist and Founder of www.PositiveWomenRock.com. Are you tired of stress, lack of confidence and fear about your future? Kelly can help. Begin getting her free Life Strategies now.
More Valentines Day ideas on YourTango:
7 Perfect Valentine's Day Ideas For Singles
9 Unconventional Valentine's Day Ideas