10 Differences Dating Widows Vs Divorcees

By

10 Differences Dating Widows Vs Divorcees
Is dating a widow the same as dating a divorcee? Here are 10 differences between the two.

Six months after my husband died, I decided to venture out into the single’s world. I sauntered into a swanky downtown Chicago restaurant with a divorced female friend. She left me perched on a bar stool to go to the restroom. I stared at the glassware on the shelves behind the bar and a guy suddenly appeared, “So when did you get divorced?
I replied, “I didn’t get divorced.”
He said, “Well where’s your husband?”
Never one to pass up a good line, I said, “Six feet under.”

That resulted in a jaw dropping, confused, uncomfortable, pitiful facial expression, as he stammered, “I’m so sorry.”

I blurted out, “But I didn’t kill him!”

This opened the door to a litany of questions: “Do you mind if I ask what happened? Do you have kids? Was that very difficult for you?”

“I’d rather not talk about it,” I mumbled.
The next question was a shocker, “Do you mind if I ask you how long has it been since you’ve had sex?”

My response without missing a beat, “Twenty-four hours.”

That interchange was my initiation into the “Planet Single Bar Hopping Phase.” I later entered the “Planet Single Dating Phase.”  Here are 10 tips to understanding the differences in dating widows vs divorcees:
1) Divorcees didn’t have a happy marriage otherwise they’d still be married. Widows had a happy marriage – or at least they only remember the happier times.

2) Divorcees have spouses who are regularly involved in their children’s lives. The spouse helps with decisions about the kids; attends their sporting events, theater performances, and weddings. Widows don’t have co-parents to rely on, but also don’t have listen to their opinions on child rearing.

3) Divorcees get a break from parenting if they have shared custody. Widows have a full time parenting gig.
4) Divorcees may get some ongoing financial support for the children and/or alimony payments. 
Widows may have inherited life insurance, but it’s typically a one-time payment.
5) Divorcees may have hostility towards the ex and perhaps the entire female/male population. Widows generally have a favorable opinion about the opposite sex.
6) Divorcees may feel relieved to be single again and eager to jump back into dating and sex. Widows may feel abandoned by the death of their spouse, and reluctant to try new relationships. They may feel guilty about being disloyal to the deceased if they date a new person. 

7) Divorcees have to deal with an ex who may be a pain in the butt. Widows don’t come with the ex factor baggage. 


Article contributed by
Advanced Member

KarenLee Poter

Dating Coach

KarenLee Poter, author and host of LoveEncore - an intimate talk show 

https://www.youtube.com/user/karenleepoter

http://www.loveencore.com

Location: Northbrook, IL
Credentials: MSW
Other Articles/News by KarenLee Poter:

10 Amazing Reasons Men Prefer Older Women In The Bedroom

By

The younger man who has a sexual encounter with an older woman will remember it as some of the best sex of his life. The benefits will continue when the young man is ready for a relationship with a girl of his age. One result to having experienced sex with a cougar is the attraction may end up becoming his "type." Once you're with a cougar, ... Read more

A Widow Without Regrets

By

Today during spin class, I had a moment of clarity. I was sweating, my heart was pounding, the wheels on my bike were revolving, the endorphins were pumping, and I heard the words to Asaf Avidan’s – One Day/Reckoning Song. “No more tears, my heart is dry I don’t laugh and I don’t cry I don’t think about you all the ... Read more

10 Reasons A Cougar Should Choose Her Face Over Being Thin

By

I've always agreed with my sorority sister’s favorite saying, "You can never be too skinny or too rich." I rationalized that being uber rich might have its problems, but I would deal with them while traveling throughout the world on my yacht. However, as I passed my 40th birthday marker, I began to question, "Can you be too ... Read more

See More

 
PARTNER POSTS
Latest Expert Videos
ASK YOURTANGO MORE QUESTIONS
Must-see Videos
SEE MORE VIDEOS
Most Popular