Sharing your fantasies with your partner is an important first step to bringing them to life. If you don’t talk about what you want, how are you ever going to get it? There are a variety of ways to have this ‘conversation’ but the main goal is to get these sexy thoughts out of your head & into real life!
Settle in for a sexy “You Share, I’ll Share” evening of naughty talk. Put the lights down low, get in close contact with one another and start talking! You can do a word association, each of you saying a word that turns you on with your partner responding with a word that turns them until you’re both feeling hot and heavy. This takes the pressure off of forming coherent sentences or spelling out your desires.
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Another way to exchange fantasies is to find erotica that you can read to each other. With ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ being sold in book stores, airports and even grocery stores it can be an easy way to introduce kinky fantasies. But that’s not the only sexy smut available, not by a long shot! Look for erotica online, print out your favorite parts and leave them as notes for each other during the day. Or take turns reading the hottest portions out loud to each other at the end of the night while you snuggle in bed. Who knows where your verbal foreplay might take you…
A journal is a great way to start a back-and-forth sexy conversation. Keep a blank notebook next to your bed (or in a drawer if you’re worried about prying eyes!) with a pen handy and when you have a hot thought, jot it down to be shared later. You can either use the journal to read to one another, or to take a peek into your partner’s fantasies without having to actually speak out loud about it. This can be a particularly helpful technique if one or both partners are shy.
You can also explore ‘dirty’ talk while you’re fooling around. Start to explore making-out again, without the pressure of following it all the way to climax. Kiss each other passionately and whisper sexy words into each other’s ears. If you do it in the dark you might feel less inhibited so you can really let your imagination fly.
However you choose to share your sexy thoughts is up to what works for you and your partner. But starting to use any of these techniques will make it easier for both of you to enjoy more adventurous erotic encounters.
With the world-wide phenomenon that the ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey” trilogy has become it’s impossible to escape the media coverage, the ecstatic fan base and the conversation it’s all stirred up. The most important aspect of these books is the permission they give to read, enjoy and even live out kinky fantasies. If these books have inspired some interest in ‘S&M’ here are some easy ways to introduce it into your sex life.
One of the central themes of the trilogy is dominance and submission. This is a power dynamic where one partner chooses to ‘give up’ control to the other partner. The books take it to a rather intense level, but you can go a little easier. Allowing your lover to ‘order you around’ or vice versa can take on a sensual feeling of letting go. This feeling can lead to a heightened sense of connection and trust.
A simple blindfold can go a long way! By shutting off one of the senses the body is forced to focus on what its feeling. The usual choices for a blind fold are pretty easy to get, in fact you might already have something on hand. A scarf or bandanna, a silk tie, stockings or one of those eye covers you can find in the relaxation aisle of your local drugstore would all do the job. Even just keeping your eyes closed can work, but having something physically deny sight will create a much stronger feeling of vulnerability.
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