Community Blog: Why Everyone Should Have A Crush



Do you remember when you were young and had a schoolboy or schoolgirl crush? Do you remember the feeling of having butterflies in your stomach when you thought of that person? Do you recall both the excitement and anxiety that filled your heart?

Having a crush not only keeps your imagination alive, but it is good for your body. Studies prove that by having a crush, hormones are released that will make you feel sexier and help you attract members of the opposite sex. It allows doors to open and the possibilities to come to the surface.

Just recently, I announced to a friend that I had a crush on Roger Daltrey, lead singer of The Who. I know it sounds silly, but when I had the opportunity to meet him in person, on his Use It Or Lose It tour, I jumped at the chance. It was a crush come true. Since that evening I started asking both singles and married couples about their crushes past and present. Call it a crush boot camp or a crush marathon, but everyone enjoyed the conversation. It just made us feel good.

Answers ranged from Bruce Springsteen and President Barack Obama, to Kirsten Dunst and Angelina Jolie. Some even expressed fond memories of the girl next door while in grade school.

More importantly, many admitted to having crushes while on their very first date with someone they met online or have reconnected on Facebook. Even recently I became facebook friends with the boy who carried my books on Sadie Hawkins Day when I was a teenager. It sparked a good feeling in both of us.

Call it preparation for becoming available for a new relationship, or use it to keep your existing relationship alive and exciting. It doesn’t have to be a crush on a celebrity. Any feelings of emotions that get the endorphins and hormones flowing may result in you smiling more, feeling better about yourself, and turn a fantasy crush into the reality of a new relationship.

My latest dating advice is to take a moment and reflect on your past or present crushes and see how it makes you feel. Your next crush may be right around the corner, and best of all - crushes never go out of style.

Julie Spira is a dating coach and the author of The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online Visit her at
Julie Spira and The Who's Roger Daltrey

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Julie Spira

Dating Coach

Julie Spira is a top online dating expert, bestselling author, dating advice columnist and coach, and media personality.  She's the author of the bestseller, The Perils of Cyber-Dating: Confessions of a Hopeful Romantic Looking for Love Online and is writing The Rules of Netiquette: How to Mind Your Digital Manners. Julie's been featured and quoted over 500 times in the news for her expertise on online dating and relationships including ABC News, BBC, CBS CNN, Cosmpolitan, E! Entertainment, ELLE, FOX, Galtime, Glamour, iVillage, Los Angeles Times, Mashable, Men's Fitness, Men's Health, New York Post, New York Times, Psychology Today, WIRED and Woman's Day. Her dating advice has appeared on eHarmony, JDate, Match, and Zoosk. Visit Cyber-Dating and share your online dating stories. Follow Julie on Twitter @JulieSpira and Like Julie on Facebook.

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Location: Los Angeles, CA
Credentials: Other
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