Have you ever gone out on a date on which you felt you really connected with the guy? The conversation is awesome. You have so much in common. He has a great sense of humor that has you laughing throughout the night. There's even a moment in the middle of your date where your mind wonders what it would be like to have sex with this guy. At the end of the date, he tells you how much he likes you, and how he would like to get together again. He seems like the perfect guy… the guy you've been waiting for.
He tells you he'll call you, and then... NOTHING! Not even an e-mail or text to say "hi." Over the next few days, you wait for the phone to ring. Each time it rings, you to race to check the caller ID, only to find out that it's… not him. The endless thoughts start racing through your head. "Was I supposed to call him?" "Did he lose my number?" "Did something happen to him?" The more you think about it, the angrier and more depressed you get. Right?
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If you have been on more than one date in your lifetime, I'd say the odds that the above scenario has happened to you is 99.9 percent.
Here is the magic question I get asked all the time: "Should I call him?" And here's my magic answer: NO!
I understand that your ego has been deflated and that your frustration is causing you to seek answers. I really do. I remember times when I've felt the same way (yes, it happens to guys too). But here's the truth: If he's not calling you, it's because… it's not that important to him.
Trust me. If he really wanted to, he would find a way to get in contact with you. He could be on the moon in the middle of the most important business deal of his life, and he would still have the capability to send you an e-mail, text or quick call from his magical iPhone. And don't me give that crap about "he was busy." If he has five minutes to go to the bathroom to take a wiz, he can give you a quick call to let you know that he's alive, thinking of you and will call you as soon as his deal is done.
If a guy calls, it's because he's interested in you, and if he doesn't, it's because he's not. It's that simple.
If you want to allow this guy back into your life when he starts making excuses as to why he didn't call when he said he would, that's your choice. But don't blame him the next time he does the same thing. As my grandfather used to say, "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me!"
You are a wonderful woman who deserves to be treated with love and respect. And if a guy doesn't show you that from day one… kick his ass to the curb!
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If you are currently single and you are having a difficult time finding the man and relationship you desire, I would like to offer you free access to my 5 day mini e-course: The 5 Biggest Mistakes Women Make in Dating. You can get instant access at http://www.SmarterDatingForWomen.com
Joe Amoia, America's Premier Dating and Relationship Coach, is the president and founder of LifeSkilz, LLC and the creator of Smarter Dating For Women and Quantum Leap Ultimate Relationship Programs.