There Are Only 3 Times You Should Say No To A Second Date
You don't owe it to anyone.
New Africa / Shutterstock It is easy to decline a second date when the first one is a disaster, but what if it was just fine?
Many singles feel like they should never deny someone a second date without clear, overwhelming evidence. But I disagree. You should never feel compelled to agree to a second date out of politeness or a sense of obligation.
In fact, you don't need any reason at all to refuse a second date. Still, there are more than a few first-date faux pas that should, at the very least, convince you to think twice before you agree to a second date.
There are only three times to say 'no' to a second date:
1. He doesn't pass the sweatpants test
Can you confidently state that you would rather be at home relaxing in your sweatpants than spend another evening out with Mr. Mediocre? If your answer is yes, please pass on the offer.
2. The conversation is one-sided
You hardly get a word in on these dates because Mr. Limelight does all the talking. Sure, he is attractive and polite, but you're the only one asking questions. Mid-way through, you wonder if you are on a date or an interview.
Admittedly, I have persevered through date No. 1, thinking that date No. 2 will mark the end of the interview phase. But to no avail. Unless you enjoy one-sided conversation, don't give Mr. Limelight a second chance to filibuster you.
3. You discuss the weather
Once I had a date interrupt our mutual silence to ask how I enjoyed last week's weather. Despite our similar careers and interests, the conversation just did not flow, and the harder we tried, the more awkward the situation became.
I feigned exhaustion, and he faked feeling distracted by work matters. Shockingly, Mr. Weather asked me out again, and even more surprising was my answer. I accepted, hoping nerves and circumstances stumped both of us for words.
But in reality, conversation on the first date is most accessible, because you start from scratch. So, the second date was even quieter than the first. After all, we really didn't have anything left to attempt to talk about … other than the weather, of course.
Jodi the Hopefull Romantic is a former love and relationship expert.