Perhaps there is someone new in your life. You want to let them know you are falling in love with them but not sure how. Maybe you have been seeing someone for a little while now. You realize that you are ready to deepen the bond or take things to a new level but you don’t want to screw it up. Perhaps there is someone special who has been in your life for a very long time. You are seeking fresh new ways to demonstrate your love and affection, but are drawing a blank. When it comes to communicating love, a generic one size fits all approach simply will not do. People respond best to a personal touch. If you want someone’s heart to melt, show them that you listen to what they say, see who they are, notice what they like and pay attention to what matters most to them. Demonstrations of love are most affective when they are custom tailored to the individual.
The same core principle that applies to a new love, also hold true for a connection that has endured the test of time. I read something the other day that reminded me of an important point. We should never assume that our partner knows how we feel about them. Sometimes people appear to forget that we need to keep love fresh and alive. Perhaps they think that because they proclaimed their love once many years ago, and made a lifelong commitment to their partner, that until they say otherwise, that the on-going love is just implied. Some may believe they already are showing their love every day because they work hard to earn a living to support the family, provide a nice home, cook meals, keep the home running smoothly, and come home at night. These wonderful behaviors do go a long way to foster a sense of security and stability, but they may not be all we need to feel loved on a more personal level. It is part of our human nature to crave love and intimacy with our beloved. We need to experience not only a physical connection but an emotional connection that is alive and ongoing. Even the toughest, most independent, and self sufficient among us needs to feel loved every day.
Sometimes we may think that it is all about the big grand gestures, and hold back from demonstrating our love until we can offer something spectacular. Perhaps we are saving up our money for an expensive gift, waiting for the perfect moment or a special occasion to show our love. But I feel that this approach is an all too common mistake that overlooks the importance of the little day to day things. The point is to communicate love, not to showing off how grand we are.
There are simple little ways that we can show that we love our partners every single day. The good news is that most of them cost nothing and are not difficult. We can show our love with a passionate kiss on the way out the door, with a thoughtful gesture that brightens our partner’s day, with a kind word, a love note hidden in the lunch box, brief case or a short little romantic text during the day. We can make plans to do something together (preferably something that we know our partner would enjoy). Our partner will feel loved; especially when we do little things that show we are paying attention to our partner, and doing the things that make them light up.