Set aside some time for yourself in the next few days where you know you won’t be disturbed by anyone or anything for a few hours. Take a notepad and pen with you. Take these instructions with you, too. Prepare a little spot that makes you feel happy. Make sure it's neat and clean and you feel comfortable and secure. It could even be outdoors if you love nature.
Pick a truly favorite spot because you will want to come here again and again when you need to sort out any type of problem. This is your special place. It’s a place you can go to be with yourself to work out important matters. You know no one will disturb you here. Maybe it’s your car overlooking a beautiful scene. Make it really special. Make it yours.
Don’t Skip This Preparation
Once you’re there, close your eyes. Breathe deeply while you settle in. Completely separate yourself from every problem that could be on your mind right now. Tell yourself you can go back to each problem when you leave your spot if you want to pick it up again. These things will wait.
Resolve not to do anything else until you are totally relaxed and you realize that everything in this moment, right now, is fine. You are okay. If this takes 30 minutes or an hour, don't do anything else until you understand that this is true for yourself.
If your mind wanders, bring it back to this single purpose. You only have to be concerned about this particular moment. Say this affirmation out loud to yourself, “Everything in this moment, right now, is fine. I am okay.” Repeat it slowly as many times as you need to until it really sinks in. Then gently whisper it to yourself several times. Then say it mentally only until you really feel it. You must be in the right place in your mind before you continue with what I am about to suggest.
Do the Rest with Care
Now open your eyes slowly, and with a lot of thought, make a list of everything you want in a true relationship (not with someone you know at the moment…forget about any particular person...but with "a" relationship that will make you truly happy for the rest of your life). What would feel good to you? What do you deserve? What do you want?
Make this a long list. Make sure to include not just surface things like how you want him to look or what he should own or do for a living, but things that include how he should treat you—how you should interact with each other—what his values are—how you should feel when you are with him—how he should treat other people—how others should view him.
Make your list real and detailed—very complete. Allow yourself to dream without a thought of whether any one thing on your list is possible or not. Make it a stretch. What do you truly want? What do you truly deserve? Remember—this is your life. It’s that important.
You can always add to this list later as you think of new things. Make sure you do add to it! It’s important to your future.
When you are finished with today's session, resolve to make this list your special requirements list for your special relationship—your guide to true love. You can name your list if you wish. Post it where you will see it often. Make a few copies and carry one with you. Treat it like gold because it is.
How to Use Your List