Expert Blog Compelling advice, stories, and thought-provoking perspectives straight from YourTango's lineup of Experts to you

Deal Breakers: Top 3 New Relationship Must Haves

Love

Turn your list upside down. Consider these 3 key ingredients

Deal breakers are a poor way of looking for a relationship. Starting by focusing on what you don't want inevitably leads you to getting more of what you don't want. The subconscious does not recognize the word don't. For example don't imagine there's a blue parrot on your shoulder. Are there deal breakers absolutely however focusing on them is putting the cart before the horse. Here are 3 must have's that make a great relationship.

One

Laughter. Laughing isn't just good for you it's essential. The ability to laugh with someone is a foundational indicator of connection. People who laugh together stay together. It's a tremendous source of endorphins and feeling happy and good with someone is a key to longevity and happiness. This one is easy to underestimate especially when you're very attracted to someone however if you're not laughing chances are you're also not being yourself.

Two

Financial stability. You can't get far being broke or being with someone who is broke. Mountains of debt place tremendous strains on relationships. How people handle their finances is how they treat everything. Financial compatibility early leads to having a partner you can build with later. People who treat themselves well and are relaxed financially have the ability to treat you well.

Three

Personal reliability. This is a huge key. The foundation of a relationship has two key components without which it won't make it. Read A Life Of Love. A relationship is a series of kept agreements. The only way you know you love yourself or anyone else is by the commitments you're willing to make and keep not to a finite fallible human being but to the relationship with a finite fallible human being.

The reason my wife and I are still together is early on we agreed to not give up. I can't tell you how profound this simple agreement was... Watch Chemistry to Commitment. to see the 7 agreements men make when they commit. Personal reliability is a way of life and a great must have you will enjoy.

Much love,

James

P.S. Learn the fastest way to meet quality guys. Sign up and watch the first video from http://chemistrytocommitment.com

Author

Contributor

Explore YourTango