“Why does dating have to be so hard?” That is the question that most of my clients always seem to ask during our initial consultation process. Nobody really teaches us how to date. Most of us learn by years of trial and error, some of us learn by observing and others are still in the process of trying to figure out what works for them. They say hind sight is 20/20 but even then, sometimes we find ourselves getting caught up in some of these infamous dating traps that keep us on our search for finding “The One.”
This past week, I surveyed a few of my clients and followers in an effort to keep up with some of the challenges they have been experiencing. Here were the top 6 mistakes that singles make and my tips on how to overcome them.
More from YourTango: 5 Tips To Make Your New Years Resolutions Stick
1. Dating without a purpose
This is something that applies strictly to those who are really on a search to get booed up. If you are dating with the intent of finding a partner, then you should make sure that your actions compliment your wants and needs.
This means if your date tells you that they are looking for something causal but you know that are looking for something more serious, you may not want to get too caught up into that relationship. I am not saying that you can’t be friends or that something won’t develop in the future. I am saying that you shouldn’t put too much stock into it until that declaration has been made.
This also means that you should shy away from entertaining sex buddies and don’t go looking for love on hook-up websites. 9 times out of 10, you will find yourself disappointed with the results. 4 Ways To Sabotage Your Online Dating Action [EXPERT]
2. Not putting yourself out there
You have to be social. This is probably the most important factor when it comes to dating. You can’t just sit around waiting and hoping that love will find you because it won’t. You have to get out and meet the natives. Have fun, strike up conversations, exchange numbers, live the kind of life that excites you.
More from YourTango: Why Are You Single?
When you are having fun and surrounding yourself with new and positive people, you will find that there are people out there who are looking for the same things you are looking for in love and in life. Single? Why Men May Ignore You [EXPERT]
3. Living in the Past
OK… so you may not have had good experiences in love and dating in the past and that’s ok. Most of us have had experiences where things didn’t exactly go as we would have liked them to, but you can’t let that trap you into staying single.