Ilene Dillon, Counselor/Therapist

Ilene Dillon - Counselor/Therapist, Family Coach, Life Coach, Marriage and Family Therapist, Marriage Educator, Social Worker - Kentfield, CA


905 Sir Francis Drake Blvd, Ste D
Kentfield, CA
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Contact Information

Email me
Call Me 415-454-5363
My Website

I Believe


"Pay attention, not to what you want to overcome, but to what you want to BECOME!"


About Me

 You’re a parent? How is it going? Are the kids loving and communicative, as you always hoped? Are they developing mastery over anger and other emotions, becoming less manipulative, learning from their mistakes, making great decisions, and staying immune to peer pressure?

And what about you? Are you getting help in this area from your children? Some children as young as 5 are making a family dinner once a week! How pressured do you feel? Are your policies as a parent so clear that you have no need to repeat yourself? Do you have time to actually have fun with your children? When you go on family trips, do they help with the luggage and navigation….or is it all up to the adults?

Whatever your issues in parenting, re-defining the “job” of being a parent, along with re-defining you child’s job, is a good place to start making changes for the better, so you become the parent of Incredible Kids!

In addition to being a Marriage and Family Counselor for 40 years, I lived 28 years as a single parent, 16 as a married parent, and have been a birth, step, adoptive and now a grand mother! I know parenting from every angle. I developed (and lived) a system for parenting called Parenting Consciously (PC). Children who are raised Consciously turn out to be Incredible Kids, who become Amazing Adults.

Be sure to pick up your free 10-page booklet, Incredible Ways to Communicate That Result in Incredible Kids!  Get acquainted with me by taking my free one-hour program, What It Takes to Raise Emotionally Masterful Kids. Stay connected with my free newsletter: Incredible Kids

I’ve taught PC all over the world, to people in very different living circumstances. If you want your child to develop mastery over his or her anger, to grow successfully out of manipulative behaviors, and to easily develop and maintain high Self Esteem, you’ll want to participate in my group, online or individual coaching programs full of skills and information. Parenting Consciously really works. It makes parenting easier; and kids become self-directing, learn from their mistakes, to make great decisions, and become immune to peer pressure. Come transform our world by raising your kids so they remain the incredible beings they were at the moment of birth!

The Reason I Became A Helping Professional

I was born to help others.  I was just fortunate enough to find ways to do it!

Like most psychotherapists, I had a very challenging early life.  The pain of those experiences brought my attention to working with my own self.  What I learned worked so well I was inspired to share it with others, which I could best do as a social worker/psychotherapist. It also stimulated my lifelong desire to develop a system for parenting that allows children to grow up by learning from their experiences, while not dragging emotional baggage with them into adulthood. There are ways to parent that do not require a person to "find themselves" as adults. 

I was a child of divorce. I've experienced two divorces. I've birthed two children, adopted one and also had step children. I raised my birth children for 28 years as a single parent.  I'm married to retired Neurosurgeon Dr. Robert Fink, and live as part of a Blended Family, with a total of 6 adult "kids". Together, we have 5 grandchildren. I learned from all of these experiences. It has made me more empathetic and knowledgeable.

I'm excited to have found ways for parents to help children learn from all the experiences of their young lives. Adults who Parent Consciously raise Incredible Kids. Those kids live amazing lives, thus transforming our world.  It is my honor to help to safely welcome and nurture new Earth Citizens, guiding them to be the Amazing Adults they were born to be.

I have spent my life helping others. I get deep satisfaction from partnering with others to help them live fulfilling and empowered lives. Working with you and your family, to improve the quality of your parenting and your life, is a privilege and an honor.

I'm affiliated with The California Association for Marriage and Family Therapists and The National Speakers Association, two organizations that have brought benefit and support to my efforts. 

Success Stories

Coaching to Redefine the "Job" of Parenting

As a person who lived as a single parent for nearly 20 years, raising my son and daughter, and as the adoptive mother of my husband's 13 year old daughter, I was prompted to develop new and different methods for parenting.  I was determined not to fit the statistics of "single mother households," with children who had teen pregnancies, were school dropouts, or who were out of control.  I ended up developing a new method, that I have called "Conscious Parenting" for the past 30 years.  This is the "coming way" of parenting.  A recent book published by Namaste' Publishing (publisher of Eckhart Tolle's books), Dr. Shefali Tsabary, is titled "The Conscious Parent."

It's not a new method, it's a new way to define parenting!  It allows a parent to be a learning partner with children, and produces children who are responsible, self-determining, make good decisions and are authentic.  No more having to "rediscover" oneself after reaching adulthood--children raised by Conscious Parents remain true to who they are at the moment of birth.

By viewing your child as a "visitor," you change everything, including discipline!  By adding the idea that you are two souls, one (you) having reached this earth prior to the other (your child), working together to grow and develop, parenting takes on a totally different hue. Your parental jobs include becoming the type of person you'd like your child to model on, learning to work with, master and balance your emotions, and processing daily life events with your child to extract the learning available for you both.  It's an amazing system.

This week, I was visited by all 5 of my grandchildren (the offspring of my son and my daughter).  They range in age from 14 to 2, and are amazing individuals.  They are expressive, warm, loving, exercise their talents (that range from singing to soccer, swimming, art, playing musical instruments, football, animal care, cooking, gardening and reading...!), and participate in the family as full and responsible members.  They also look after one another and people they care about, exercising empathy.  It was a joy to see that the work I did to develop Conscious Parenting has been passed down and just seems to create a better and better outcome as the generations unfold!

In 2009, my friend and co-host, Life Coach Deki Fox and I started "Building Conscious Families," a weekly radio program aired over The Women's Information Network (  On this show, we talk about the basic philosophy, approaches and outcomes of parenting consciously, which is what is needed to create families for the future.  We recently interviewed Yeshi Newman, a California grandmother who holds week-long workshops on Conscious Grandmothering!  Check us out!

Most parents are parenting differently than their parents did.  It's my observation, however, that we haven't yet found a solid "system" for parenting that holds together in the way our "old system" has.  Conscious Parenting is evolving into that new system.  I've been teaching people in the US and Australia for over 30 years how to parent consciously, including the new approach to discipline, the power of decision-making, and the importance of working with remorse and forgiveness to help our children grow.  The success story I offer is my own.  The more I share my learning with the world, the more this success story can be yours, and the success story of humans everywhere, too. For this, I am truly grateful!




CredentialsLCSW, LMFT
Time in Practice25 years +
I practice inAll areas, please inquire
Additional ExpertiseFamily Coach
Life Coach
Marriage and Family Therapist
Marriage Educator
Social Worker
I offer my servicesAt my office
By Email
Via Skype
I am fluent inEnglish
Licence informationExpiration 3/31/14
Number MFC 5747 LCS 7035 (exp 04/31/2014)
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