One can only imagine the reasons why a mother would train her daughter to go after money, but it happens. There is a fierce pattern involved in why a mother would want her daughter to seek money over love. Seeking love and respect is what most mothers and fathers want their children to seek as they grow and mature into adults. However, when a mother is hoping her daughter hits the lottery, it is a very wicked web that both fall into. I have experienced gold-digging at its finest. You may not imagine that women behave like this, but think again.
Pretty girls’ expectations
The biggest gold-digger I ever knew was named Lynn, a pretty blonde with a nice body. She had two kids very young, so when she was in her early 30s, they were already in their early teens. Lynn met Paul, a very well-paid Silicon Valley CFO who had a thing for pretty girls. Here is the obvious sign: Lynn was only 33 or so, and Paul was already in his 50s. Paul promised Lynn the world, and Lynn was living a very good life on Paul's dime. When it came time to get married, Paul busted out an iron-tight prenup two days before the wedding. It wasn't some small-time event, either. It was going to be huge, with all of her family flying in on Paul's dime. Lynn signed the prenup but knew she was on a mission. Paul and Lynn had always played games with each other, but Lynn's new mission was Paul's money. She bought the best of everything, lived in a million-dollar home and drove her nice new BMW. A few years into the marriage, Paul quit his job. He had this vision of creating a billion-dollar company. But once the $40,000-a-month salary stopped, the marriage began to struggle. Paul had always allowed Lynn to spend what she wanted. Her children were in the best schools, and she made sure she had a nice little savings account Paul didn't know about. The very minute Paul's new company wasn't generating income, Paul had to take out a million-dollar loan on his house. Now, how long was the marriage going to last? She left him real fast, then admitted to me she never gave a hoot about him. He was security.
Why do mothers seek a son-in-law with money?
1. The family wants a breadwinner, simple as that. If a son-in-law is making over $500,000 a year, writing a check for $5,000 to help his mother-in-law fix her house isn't a big deal. The entire family knows that getting a check isn't going to be hard.
2. The mother knows the daughter doesn't have any ambition to do anything with herself and will have to marry money to have someone take care of her. My friend's mother groomed her for that, and it worked.
3. Social status in a small community. It’s crazy, but some mothers desire the status that comes with saying, “My daughter married a ‘Johnson’ or a ‘Smith.’ I have seen this happen quite a bit in smaller towns.
4. The mother is hoping the daughter will get the life she never had, with all the material possessions she ever dreamed about. Pushing a daughter to marry rich will ensure a mother that her little girl will get the white picket fence, the vacations to Italy and the savings account the mother never had. The mother lives through the daughter.
5. Completely poverty-stricken homes are more likely to have a pretty daughter the parents know will be able to land a rich guy. The entire family will push for the daughter to try harder. How many families of CEOs or billionaires care how much money their son-in-law has? A totally broke family is going to see a pretty daughter and know if she is groomed and trained just right, she will help the family.
6. Family competition is the worst. My family is already very competitive, so when I told my family I was dating a lawyer, it became the talk. When a family is very concerned about who is doing what, marrying a rich man is a huge bonus.
7. Retirement: the worst reason of all. I have heard several mothers say they hope their daughters can afford to take care of them when they are old. A struggling family can't take care of sick ol’ Mom, but a rich one can.
Men are going to have to wise up to the rhyme and reason of women’s behavior. Any man that has money needs to be prepared for all kinds of women to come his way. The best thing for a rich man is to try to make his wallet not appear so big.
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This article was originally published at How To Get The Woman of Your Dreams . Reprinted with permission from the author.