Beads & Breasts: Mardi Gras In The Toad Kingdom

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Beads & Breasts: Mardi Gras In The Toad Kingdom
Looking to find love during Mardi Gras in New Orleans? Avoid the 'Toads' and look elsewhere!

New Orleans is ready to run amok! Cities and towns across the country are gearing up to celebrate right along with the Cajuns in themed parties and parades. The Toad Kingdom is in a state of frenzy. What is the cause? Beads and breasts! You may not know it but for decades, one of the rather crudest parts of the annual fest is the baring of breasts. Women, usually in an alcoholic stupor, lift their shirts, showing off their assets for the precious reward of a cheap set of made in China plastic beads.

If you are single and looking, there is no better example of the sliminess of the Toad Kingdom than Mardi Gras. Much like “Girls Gone Wild”, this annual tradition is now captured on cell phone video cameras and women can be forever memorialized in YouTube postings that may haunt them for years. 3 Places Not To Let Your Guard Down On A First Date

 

Both Frogs and Toads can barely contain themselves with the idea of drunken women opening their blouses for the promised beads. After all, every man appreciates the naked breast regardless of if they are straight, gay or in between. Let’s face it, the female body is stunning. You can’t expect the Frogs to shield their eyes when a gorgeous lady “earns” her beads.

 If you are new to the idea of viewing the online dating community as the 'Toad Kingdom', I explain it fully in my upcoming book, The Art of Toad Kissing, but for now here’s what you need to know. Frogs are men with class, Toads just want a piece of ass. While you can’t blame these poor guys for their antics, (even the most gentlemanly of southern gentlemen will strain for a free peek at perky young boobies) you will be relieved to know that the Frogs’ motives are very different from the Toads. The Secret To Successful Online Dating

The truth is, Frogs are looking for women they can take home to meet their mothers and while they may steal a peek, it is highly unlikely that your Prince Charming in the making would overlook your drunken indiscretion and see you as a mate. In all of the excitement, single women in the 'Toad Kingdom' of online dating risk being tempted by the hordes of cheering Toads dangling shabby but shiny plastic beads in a frenzy of desire. Why is this important? Online Dating In The Toad Kingdom

The number one concern that my clients harp on is their safety in the online dating world. “How do I know I can trust him?” “There are just creeps and weirdos out there.” Ladies you do not want to have anything unsavory online. Remember, quality men know how to use Google and guess what, some of them think that only skanks use online dating. You don’t want to give them any ammo with a careless double standard.

Remember, I have kissed more than my fair share of Toads and I am here to tell you that you can spot a toad from a mile away if you know what to look for. Here are some tips:

 
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