Game Over: How Playing Video Games Can Be A Form Of Cheating


infidelity advice: video games
If your boyfriend is addicted to gaming, here's how to get his attention back.

If you're dating a gamer, you're already all too familiar with the sleepless nights because your partner staying up late, button-mashing on a handheld controller and staring in front of a flicking monitor.

You're not alone and the numbers are impressive: As a planet, people spend three billion hours a week gaming. What's even worse is that a new study claims that the majority of men would choose video games over sex. According to, out of 1,442 UK men who were all in long-term relationships, 49 percent said they would chose video games over sex. In addition to that, 19 percent of guys said it would depend on the game. Sure, gaming can have positive benefits, but if you feel like your man is part of that statistic, you may be second fiddle to his virtual world. Your partner is likely facing an addiction — and you could be the victim of an affair.


It's true, we don't think of gaming the way we traditionally think of infidelity, but any time your partner spends time and energy on something in a way that detracts from the relationship, that's an affair. Excessive gaming has its roots in the same imbalance that causes things like drug addiction, alcoholism, financial infidelity and other addictive, obsessive behaviors. When you look at it that way, gaming can be an affair — it takes the place of love.

People who struggle with addiction — whether it be gaming or sex — suffer from a biochemical craving for connection. They crave what they're addicted to and they're looking for something to help them escape and give them a thrill. This escapism can easily take the form of a video game — that's kind of the whole point. The alternate worlds and experiences lend themselves to thrill-seeking behavior. The problem is that it's a vicious cycle. People who are struggling with a need to connect seek escapism, which rewards them for a while but they end up just needing more and thus feeling even more disconnected! Keep reading...

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Dr. Bonnie Weil


Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil
Relationship and Family Therapist

Location: New York, NY
Credentials: PhD
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