5 Tips to manage the holidays when you are single

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5 Tips to manage the holidays when you are single
Wish January 2nd would come already? Here are some tips to help you get through happy family season.

I know this time of year is the worse time to be single. Whether you just got out of a painful relationship or have been single for years, the holidays are just not very jolly when you are alone. Surrounded by all the happy couples your mind will quickly assume that they have so much more than you and that your life is awful. While you wade through the holiday garland and festivities, here are some tips to keep your chin up and maybe even get a date for New Year’s eve.

1. Don’t judge yourself based on your social status. So many people feel “less than” others because they are single. Coupled people are not gifted with greatness they are just in a different place. When you really get to know them, you realize that their life has challenges as well.


2. Focus on the good you have in your life. Being a part of a happy couple is not the end of life’s problems. I know a large part of your life may feel empty, but there are many others who are suffering that have much less than you. Be grateful that you have a job, your health or even had a meal today. Start with the small things and soon you will find many reasons for being blessed right now.

3. Get into the “person in love” mode. Your life will bring you what you believe. If you keep seeing yourself as a lonely, single person, then that is what your experience will be. Start fooling your inner mind that you are already a person in love. How would you act, dress or feel if you were a person who has met the love of their life? Pretend with internal visualization and watch how your circumstances in the outer world begin to shift.


4. Remember that your situation is temporary. Life is always changing and just because you haven’t met your dream person up until today, there is absolutely no reason why you couldn’t meet him or her this afternoon or later this week. Keep the attitude as if your wonderful someone is on their way to you right now and you will soon see that come to fruition.


5. Give. When you really want love in your life, the best thing you can do is give it away. Send love and good intentions to those you pass in the street, even those annoying couples who seem to be everywhere in front of you. When you start to discover that there is so much love inside of you, you begin to shift the energy of what you attract. By sending out bitterness toward the holiday and happy people, you only get more of that back. Imagine spending the entire day sending love and attending a holiday party feeling so full of love instead of desperate for it. It has been said that in giving, you receive.

A month before I met my boyfriend I was dreading the holidays and wondering how I would get through without going into deep depression. I started taking new actions and continued to focus on possibilities and I met him the week before Thanksgiving. You never know when your person is going to appear in your life so don’t keep creating your future based on your past. In a New York minute, anything can change.

Article contributed by
Advanced Member

Debi Berndt

Author

Debi Berndt is the co-founder of CreativeLove.com, a personal development system for singles to stop fixing themselves and finally find true love. She works with her partner, Dr. Robert Maldonado (Psychologist). Their system was developed based on Carl Jung's work and influenced by Eastern Philosophy.  Debi is also the author of the bestselling book, LET LOVE IN. Get your free lecture and meditation - Why you are single and how to find love without fixing yourself here.

Location: Santa Monica, CA
Credentials: CHT
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