1. By GIVING More than your Man:
The Man should be the one mainly driving the beginning of the relationship – HE should be the pursuer, not the woman. It’s in his primal nature to want to hunt and chase for his ‘prize.’ Don’t buy him drinks, or bring him a gift, bake him a cake or offer to drive on dates or pick him up somewhere if he’s been drinking. When a woman gives a lot in the beginning, it’s perceived by men as desperate and lowers your value. (Note to women with money who like to “spoil” their friends and men…. DON’T!)
2. By Grabbing the Check.
Pulling out cash or a credit card, grabbing the check, or paying for anything for that matter within the first few dates gives off masculine energy and throws off the ‘natural’ balance of the male and female roles. Even if you make more money than him, for almost all men, grabbing your cash or insisting on paying for things is a turn-off and is emasculating. After a few dates, you can lightly offer to pay the tip of the bill or get your drinks here and there or something small, and then later down the road the finances can be shared a bit more evenly; but in the first couple of dates, let him act as the "provider" that men more naturally are, or you’ll wind up reversing the roles and he’ll feel like he’s on a date with a man. Not very sexy.
3. By Talking about your Exes and former Relationships
Especially, NEVER talk about former partner mistreating you, cheating on you, or dumping you. People that you date learn how to treat you by the last relationship you describe – and few will treat you any better. Negative talk about your ex only makes YOU sound like a loser for dating them or putting up with them.
4. By Talking excessively about your Business, your Degrees & Credentials, accomplishments, and Work Work Work!
This is Turn-off city. Men do not want to compete in the bedroom like they do in the boardroom. All your work talk oozes masculine energy onto his plate. Unless you want to be treated like a man and wonder why your men keep going MIA after the first date, you’d better learn how to slip into Ms. Feminine and leave the Businessman at the office. (Extra shout-out to female Attorneys and business owners – for some reason, they seem to have the hardest time with this). It's fine to talk about what you're passionate about and to seek out things in common, but excessive work talk isn't the way to go.
5. By doing 1 (or all) of the Following within the first 5 Dates!