The weird and wonderful world of Facebook! It amazes me how many people are so damn active on it. It makes me wonder when they have time to connect with people in person.
I saw a couple of people leaving an office today and the first thing they did was log onto mobile Facebook, as if they hadn't been looking at it all day on the office computer! They couldn’t even wait to get home. They had to log on right then and there to respond to any messages or comments.
Let me tell you what's wrong with that picture. People aren't present in their lives.
Are you a wannabe reporter or wannabe reality star? Do you have to post your every little move on Facebook so that a bunch of people you rarely talk to can write you a comment? What's the point?
Don't you realize that when you're constantly answering people on Facebook and posting your entire day on there, you're actually missing the things happening in front of your eyes? Have you forgotten the good old days before Facebook when we had a little thing called, face-to-face communication?
Do you remember when you'd meet a stranger, share a moment with them, and then have a conversation about something? Sometimes you'd even strike up a friendship with someone new this way. Now, instead of enjoying our moments, we post them to Facebook where a group of distant friends can post a comment about it.
When I see chronic Facebook posters, I think one of two things must be going on: either they really crave attention, or they don't trust themselves and their decisions in life so they're looking for social validation. Facebook has become like a therapy session.
It's as if these people need a pat on the head for doing something good in their life. The more comments and likes they receive, the better they feel about what they did. It's like the little kid at school who constantly runs to the teacher for validation that they're doing their work right. For some people, Facebook helps them to function, and to me that is sad.
Maybe YOU use Facebook as a form of therapy, motivation, or validation.
I can understand it. In life, sometimes we're alone and we look for validation. Your love language might dictate that you need words of affirmation, and Facebook is what gives them to you. It could be that Facebook is giving you what you lack from being single.
We all need validation from time to time. We all need a big hug now and then. It can be good to get reassurance as long as you're not going over the top with it. If you're just posting for attention, or because you want people to tell you you're looking "hot," then you need to think about what you're doing.
Why aren't you open to finding validation in your real life? What makes you look for social validation from Facebook vs. real life connections? It's almost like an addiction and one you need to take seriously. The website is really built to become an addiction, and that's why it's made so much money.
I'd always rather connect with someone face to face. I'd much rather sit opposite someone and look in his/her eyes rather than look at him/her on a screen! I want to have a real moment with someone. That's what I personally crave. If someone is going to tell me they like me, I want them to do it face to face, not on Facebook.
It's not a popularity contest, but that's how people use it. It's like a giant cyber high school and all the girls want to become the cheerleader that all the other girls look up to. The guys all want to be the QB that all the guys are jealous of and all the girls adore.
If you're addicted to using Facebook, I want you to think about what I'm going to say very carefully. Facebook has tricked you, and is taking advantage of our natural human insecurity and desire to be loved. The world can be a lonely place, and some people don't know how to connect.
Facebook and the Internet has offered people an alternative way to connect, but it's not real. Facebook is not real life and it's not real friendships.
Unless you get off Facebook and start connecting with real people, until you learn how to connect with men, all you'll be left with is hundreds of fake friends you never see, some meaningless validation, and cold, shallow emotions. Life can be so much more than that, and it seems like such a waste to experience the world digitally.
More how to happy advice on YourTango: