A guy you've been dating suddenly goes cold? What's gone wrong? Wasn't he the one? Who cares!
Oh my God! You've met a guy. He's so amazing, or you think he is. You feel like you've finally discovered how to find love. He only took you out for a coffee, but he was so sweet and attentive. Could he be the one?
If you've ever been in this situation you need to ask yourself, are your feelings real or are they just in your imagination because you haven't met enough men?
You see if you haven't been out with many guys but you're desperate for love, you could be grabbing for this first guy because he's paid you some attention. You end up looking desperate and guess what happens?
He's starts backing off a little and you don't understand why. The next thing you know he's not answering your calls and whenever you text him, there's always an excuse why he can't talk right now.
It's right about then you head into the dreaded, "Dating Speculator Zone."
It's that cold, lonely place, where you try to second guess and analyze what went wrong with the relationship. You ask your friends, you go into online forums, or you write to me asking, "Dear David, what can I do? Things were going so well with this guy, but now he's gone cold. Why doesn't he want me?"
Here's the deal ladies. You'll never know what he's really thinking unless you ask him. When women ask me what I think, I say the same thing every time, "Give me the guys number and I'll tell you what he's thinking because I'll ask him right away."
If you want to know how to find love here's the first thing you have to do. You have to stop obsessing about guys who stop responding to you. Forget playing guessing games. Ask him why he's stop answering your calls or texts and deal with the problem.
If he won't talk to you about it, forget him!
You deserve better! Stop chasing love and start attracting love.
It's been said so many times before because it's true, "Don’t chase love because you'll never catch it."
You can't force love. It happens naturally or it doesn't happen at all. If you spend months obsessing about a guy who's gone cold on you, those are months of your life you'll never get back. Yes, you might long to be in a relationship, but trying to force one that only exists in your head is a waste of time and heartache.
You know all those nights you spent dissecting your failed relationship with your friends at the local bar?
I bet you didn't see that tall, dark, handsome guy trying to catch your eye. He stared at you all night, wondering why you didn't respond to him. He was a lovely guy, but you missed out on him because you weren't present in the moment.
You were stuck in the "Relationship Speculator Zone" trying to find answers that don't exist. Don't waste any more of your time on men that don't want you. Trust me, for every man who lets you down, there'll be three desperate to fill his shoes.
So here's what I want you to do from now on: Date with abundance. Date with gusto. Date with a knowledge that if you put yourself out there for every single date you go on, you're going to meet somebody absolutely fantastic and life is going to be great.
You're a gift. Your mantra every day should be, "I am a beautiful, loving, incredible and special woman that deserves the best guy I can possibly find, and if I didn't find him today, I'm going to find him tomorrow."
It's time you just woke up and realized, the guys who don't want you don't matter. It's time for you to embrace your life every single day. Love yourself. Respect yourself. And stop looking for answers that don't exist.
Get out there, meet guys, and have fun dating.
More how to get a boyfriend advice from YourTango:
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