You know it's not going to work out, so why do you stick around?
It's January—time for a fresh, clean slate. So how do you know if a relationship is ending, or if you should end it?
Here is the cycle, the reason certain relationships are no longer going to work, and why you need to move on.
You've been with this guy for a while. You've given him more than 90 days.
I believe that you see every side of a man in the first 90 days. His habits or his lack of habits, his romance skills, his bedroom skills, his communication skills—everything. You're going to see everything that a man is in the first 90 days.
Unfortunately, most women decide to turn him into a project on day 91.
You see his "potential", when in reality, he is exactly who he is. He's not going to change.
It's a long, cold season.
You try to change him in the second 90 day period of the relationship. You see, relationships are just like four seasons.
You meet him in spring. It feels great, and you like him.
You see he's got some flaws, but you know that a little bit of gardening will facilitate his growth into something amazing.
Day 90 to day 180 is the summertime of a relationship. This is when you can see if your gardening, all the work you're doing, is starting to blossom.
The problem is, what comes after summer?
When the leaves start to fall, he starts to apologize for not being better for you. That's when he tells you that he's having trouble making these changes, but he'll try.
But every day, he goes back to exactly who he was before. The leaves start falling off the relationship, and you start seeing him for who he really is.
Then, like the seasons, you're back to Winter, which is where you are right now.
It's probably in the winter of your relationship. There's a deep freeze over your sex life. There's a deep freeze over the communication skills.
You bang your head against the wall.
You saw the beauty of spring, and it led to the blossoming of summer. Then, during the heat of the summer, you realized he couldn't keep up with some of the demands that you made of him.
You watched him come apart during the Fall, and you started to see him for exactly who he was.
Now, you're in the deep freeze of winter. You're in this relationship that you've put a lot of time and effort into. But the real problem is what's staring you in the face: Father Winter.
No, he's not wearing a jolly red suit; that was Santa Claus.
Father Winter is sleeping next to you in the bed. He's not satisfying you emotionally or physically.
You've tried to water the garden. You've tried to create an amazing relationship.
But, he's not giving you what you want and you can't continue because spring is right around the corner.
You're just going to continue to bang your head against the wall.
Relationships tend to have 4 seasons.
That's not the hotel with great room service. It's more like the four seasons of your life.
So take a look at the man standing in front of you.
Ask yourself, "have I done enough?" The answer's there for you to see.
Wouldn't you like to start Spring off on a more upwardly note?
Wouldn't you like spring to bring you a man and a relationship where you can blossom? Something real, and amazing, that you deserve.