Five Keys to a Radical Marriage


Five Keys to a Radical Marriage
Normal is boring. Here's a new paradigm for couples who want to live life to the fullest together. (adjective): very different from the usual or traditional

Most couples don't want an ordinary, boring, routine relationship. They want excitement, fun, closeness, love. When we get married we make vows to be together until death do us part. That's a long time, and sadly, half of marriages don't or can't keep that commitment. We have a dream or vision of how we want our life together to be. We become unhappy if we're too far off track from that dream. If we don't believe our dream is possible we  feel hopeless, stuck, and eventually leave the marriage mentally, emotionally, and often physically.

The current marriage rate is at an all time low (51%) and 44% of millenials believe that marriage is obsolete. And who can blame them? Looking around at their parent's marriage and others, they see more downsides than benefits. Thankfully, as they mature their attitude towards marriage gets warmer. More here.

While traditional marriage may be on the decline, marriage has many benefits and an important role in our society, but it's clear that it's time for marriage to evolve. We need a new paradigm for marriage as a clear path to happiness and fulfillment, rather than shackles holding us back from living life to the fullest.

When "Good" Isn't Good Enough

We need comfort and security. When our life or relationship is challenging, this becomes our goal and priority. But when our life is "good" together, then what? When we don't move, we atrophy. Our nature is to continue evolving and the comfort and security we craved earlier can result in boredom and even unhappiness. Given our nature and the reality that things constantly change, enthusiastically embracing change and evolution as an adventure seems to be the key to happiness and fulfillment, and resisting change seems to almost guarantee eventual misery. Keep reading...

More marriage advice from YourTango

This article was originally published at . Reprinted with permission.
Article contributed by

David Steele


David Steele, MA, LMFT
Founder, Relationship Coaching Institute


Location: Campbell, CA
Credentials: LMFT, MA, MFT
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