Obligation, lack of communication, anger and disrespect poison our relationships.
Relationships have given me great opportunities to get to know more of myself.
We cannot discount the relationships that have been a struggle because this is where we can learn about our unhealthy patterns. People can trigger negative feelings of unworthiness and lies that tell us we are not good enough.
When we start to walk on egg shells, feel unsafe or uncomfortable our inauthenticity becomes a barrier to love. The freedom of joy, passion,intimacy, trust, and safe love keep relationships alive!
I have always known that respect is a major player in a healthy relationship. Respecting others has been an important attribute. There was a time in my life when I would be disrespected by people who were significant relationships. I would become passive with my anger and feel myself shut down. I would see myself be the good girl for love and walk on egg shells or become nice and make them comfortable.
By staying in this unhealthy pattern I would be disrespecting myself.
I would loose respect for myself because I would continuously go back to the relationship after the hurtful experience and love again. When I would be criticized or judged I would give my power away.
Our human nature is made up of imperfections, the way I choose to learn and grow in love with people in relationship includes taking responsibility for my anger and communicate authentically with respect for others and myself.
As long as I surrendered my self to preserve the relationship or walked on eggshells in order to create an inauthentic safeness …I was inauthentic…I harmed my self-worth… I was stifled and couldn’t find my light. I didn’t respect myself.
To stay in a relationship that is unsafe, where you cannot breathe fully is your choice. If you are in relationship with someone who is disrespectful remember that silence is acceptance. Communicate with them how you feel when they hurt you and that you will not be disrespected. Respect yourself enough to say "no this is not good enough".
If they refuse to honor your boundaries you must take steps to take care of yourself.
Self-respect is empowering.