6 Ways To Keep Your Self-Esteem When Dating A Bully

By

6 Ways To Keep Your Self-Esteem When Dating A Bully [EXPERT]
If you're dating someone who's a bully, here are some tips to put them in their place.

Your dating a great guy. Yeah, he can be sweet, fun, generous and have a great sense of humor. There's just one little problem — sometimes he acts like a bully. With October being National Bullying Awareness Month, it's good to know what to watch for and how to handle this importnat issue.

Your boyfriend's bullying behavior might include:

  • Raising his voice
  • Belittling your choices
  • Refusing a simple request
  • Not able to let go of an argument
  • Calling you names
  • Never apologizing for his behavior

Let's face it — when the guy you are dating acts like a bully, it can be very intimidating. It seems like he loves you and most of the time you get along well. Yet, there are times when the bully shows up and you wonder about the choice you've made. Dating a bully can chip away at your self-esteem and confidence which is never good for you or the relationship.

Dating a bully comes with its own set of problems. You may freeze up or suppress your own needs and give in, doing things his way to keep the peace. This is a natural reaction but can allow resentment to build. You might also feel aprehensive as you want to brace yourself for the next bullying episode.

When the guy you're dating becomes a bully, what can you do handle the situation and retain your self-esteem? Below you'll find six suggestions to help you navigate these emotional waters and potentially turn things around.

1. Decide you will not be bullied. Making this decision to no longer be a victim is very empowering. From here you can start to take steps to address the bullying behavior or focus on self-preservation.

2. Let your boyfriend know you will only talk to him when he is respectful. Don't bring this up in the middle of an argument. Say something when things are calm again. Tell him that he needs to speak in a regular tone of voice and volume, avoid name calling and listen to and consider what you have to say. He can't fight with you if you won't play his game.

More dating advice from YourTango Experts:

Article contributed by

Coach Ronnie Ann Ryan

Dating Coach

The Dating Coach for Women Over 40

Get my free book 7 Dire Dating Mistakes Women Make That Keep You Single here.
Author of MANifesting Mr. Right, Why Can't I Find Love and How to Sizzle Vs. Fizzle Online

Location: Milford, CT
Credentials: CCC, MBA
Specialties: Dating/Being Single Support
Other Articles/News by Coach Ronnie Ann Ryan:

It's A First Date, Not St. Patrick's Day — Stop Drinking

By

Everyone gets a little nervous on a first date. That's why many singles think a drink seems like a good idea. A little alcohol can steady your nerves and give you a shot of confidence. But as a dating coach for women over 50, I wonder if drinking too much on a date can be keeping you from getting more second dates. According to a new study conducted by ... Read more

Spot A Pick Up Artist — Before He Seduces You

By

There is a whole underground movement focused on how to pick up women. Some men have actually formed clubs and called themselves Pickup Artists (PUA). They study methods to pickup women and seduce them. The goal is to have their way with countless women in order to boost their ego and gain power. As a dating coach for women, I want you to know about the ... Read more

This Batman Day, Find Your Caped Crusader

By

Today has officially been named Batman Day because it is the 75th Anniversary of the beloved DC Comic hero. Do you remember watching Batman on TV? A big Kabam...Zap...Pow! to you! As a dating coach for women over 40, I started wondering…is that how you feel about dating? Every time you meet and are disappointed by a new man, you get the ... Read more

See More

Ask The Experts

Have a dating or relationship question?
Visit Ask YourTango and let our experts and community answer.

FROM AROUND THE WEB