Do you ever worry that you are going to scare a man away if you show him how you feel? You aren’t alone. Many women find themselves playing games or pretending not to care in order to keep a man attracted and interested.
What’s interesting is that what drives a man away isn’t showing him how you feel or being honest. Feelings by themselves don’t scare a man, It’s what you’re doing with those feelings that makes all the difference.
What’ll Drive Him Away
The most certain and complete way to drive a man away (and as far away as possible) is to become overly needy, clingy, and suspicious because you’re feeling unsure of where things stand or what he wants from your relationship. Whatever you’re afraid of actually becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. That’s because once you subconsciously believe something to be true, you tend to find proof of it everywhere. In this case, it becomes reality because your anxiety causes you to be needy and clingy – and completely kills any attraction he felt for you.
Often, problems in relationships don’t require answers-- they require a different belief system. Change what you believe and you can prevent problems in the first place.
What Attracts Him
A man expects that if a woman likes him, then she should feel good when she's around him. If you’re constantly stressed, worried or unhappy around him - whatever the reason - it makes him feel inadequate. It’ll compel him to want to spend less time around you.
There are three ways to communicate your needs that will make him not only feel good, but make him want to spend more time around you:
Be clear about what you want from him and what you expect without frustrating or confusing him even more. Men aren’t great at giving emotional support and nurturing, and they’re equally bad at figuring out what’s bothering you or why you’re unhappy. Know what you want from him and be clear about it.
Find out why you’re chronically unsatisfied with him. Men want to be around women who make them feel good about themselves. Telling him that he is constantly doing things wrong is just a big turn off for him.
Don’t hide what you’re thinking and feeling because you think you’ll scare him away. Men actually expect women to be a kind of "emotional leader” in relationships. Women bring a deeper and richer emotional aspect to their lives they don’t have elsewhere.
In general, the way to attract a man is to feel good about yourself and know what you want and how to communicate it clearly. When a man sees that you feel great, he’ll feel great too, and everything else will magically get easier.
If you’ve ever wanted to know what a man really thinks about dating and commitment, subscribe to Christian’s free e-newsletter. He’ll reveal the kind of qualities a man can’t help falling for in a woman and what it takes to make him give up his “single” freedom for the love of just one woman…for the long term.