Let's explore the controversy over the reunion of Rihanna and Chris Brown!
There's certainly a lot of buzz being created by the reunion of Rihanna and Chris Brown. There are always two sides of every story and this one is no different. It's interesting. There are various perspectives and opinions being shared out there by family, friends and fans about whether their getting back together is a good or bad decision. This is a classic case of Ying and Yang. 3 Ways 'Love' Benefits Your Health
Let's explore the pros and cons about the views and challenges this young celebrity couple are facing as they go through this very public reunion full of controversy.
- Domestic violence:
So, we know Chris was charged and convicted of domestic assault about three years ago. Chris Brown admitted guilt to assaulting Rihanna and pictures surfaced three years ago of Rihanna's face to showcase the incident. Domestic abuse happens every day, and it is reported that within a community, there is approximately one in five women that have experienced domestic abuse (that have been reported).
What does this mean? The two sides here are, in one case, Rihanna shouldn't return to an abusive partner. On the other hand, she loves him enough to forgive him and give him a second chance. Chris — who admitted guilt, served his sentence and was a model probationer — recognized his wrong and was forgiven. Why should he be continually reminded of something he did in the past when he's made amends, and more importantly, has been forgiven by the person he wronged? A Domestic Violence Survivor's Advice For Rihanna
Ultimately, it is Rihanna's decision and I'm not convinced this is a bad choice either. Many couples who go through this type of situation can and do survive with the willingness to work on their challenges, get proper help and support and it seems they certainly do have supportive friends and family amongst the "haters."
- Being role models:
Rihanna and Chris are certainly public figures and I'm sure they have their "followers." But, the criticism saying that Rihanna's decision to get back together will influence the young girls or women of this world returning to their abusive partners is "good", in my mind is just gossip and something negative to focus on. Seriously, if your child, friend or anyone is making decisions based on what someone else is deciding doing, than they need to have a check-up from the neck up. Help! My Therapy Is Not Working! Now What? [VIDEO]
Our moral values are instilled in us through parenting and education ... not by pop stars. One positive that I can see here is a strong, independent, young woman that is making decisions that she feels are right for her situation, based on all of the facts and what she knows about herself and her partner.
To forgive or not forgive? That is the question. Have you ever been a victim of domestic violence or abuse? Do you know what it's like to be on either side? It's interesting that the people who comment, in my mind, probably have never even been through it themselves. We are always quick to point fingers and pass judgement when we have no understanding & appreciation for what actually occurred. 3 Reasons We're Angry About Rihanna Secretly Seeing Chris Brown
Let's be clear. Domestic violence and abuse is wrong and should be addressed and fixed immediately. Rihanna and Chris understand this better than anyone having been through it themselves. Usually when domestic violence occurs, it is a combination of very bad circumstances, heated feelings and emotions. Is this wrong? Absolutely! Can it be fixed? Absolutely! The abuser is not always a repeat offender.
My own research on the assessment of risk for recurrent maltreatment proves that it is very low as reported by caseworkers dealing with domestic abuse cases. In fact if there is something that will help this couple, it is that their private lives are so public which is a big deterrent for there to be a repeat incident. What Does The Future Hold for Rihanna & Chris Brown?
So why don't we focus on the positives here? We are all accountable for our choices and this young couple recognizes that a very bad thing happened to them. Rihanna has stated: I was going through the hardest time of my life. I was angry, sad, confused, torn. I was still in love. And I needed to talk about it. That was the only way I could get peace, because it was in my head, and I couldn't leave it there.
Chris was publicly humiliated and saddened by this event. Whenever you see pictures of the couple, they definitely seem to be very much in love and I applaud their efforts in playing to their strengths and getting through this situation. Honesty, trust and communication are foundations to a fulfilling and lasting relationship. All relationships go through shares of highs and lows. If we can learn anything from this situation, I would ask the following questions rather that criticize them:
- What can we learn about domestic abuse to better understand it?
- How can we educate people on the getting the right help?
- What can be done when domestic abuse occurs?
- How does a couple survive and get over a domestic abuse incident?
As for Rihanna and Chris Brown, I appreciate the efforts as a couple to stand strong and get the help and support needed to get through this. Life is short and not meant to be wasted. As for the nay sayers, domestic abuse is wrong, no doubt. So right the wrongs if you are passionate about it and stop focusing on a couple that has no impact to your life! Right & Wrong Things To Tell Kids About Chris Brown
*Photo Credit: Here
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