Single mom? Find your happily ever after right after you learn to love yourself.
Oh, fairy tales, stories and fables, what hope you gave us as children! We grew up reading Snow White, Cinderella and believing in the Tooth Fairy and Tinkerbelle. We awaited the day when Prince Charming would come and sweep us off our feet and escape with us to a beautiful castle where we'd have the perfect wedding and live happily ever after.
For many, though, that fairy tale has ended, and the magic is gone. You are stuck raising your kids as a single mom—overwhelmed, frustrated and exhausted. You ask yourself, "What did I do wrong? How did I end up here?"
I've been where you are, and I know where you are going! I know how much guilt you feel for not giving your kids the life you wanted. I know the pain, guilt and shame you are feeling about not being a good enough mother. You feel like you are in a state of overwhelm and you wonder if your efforts will ever be enough.
Erin Hill, a mom from Texas, recently shared in a CNN Article: "I know I have to make peace with my choices, with our fate and with the childhood that they will experience, but I'm not there yet." Is it about making peace with her fate or about finding the courage to let go of her old beliefs and create new ones?
No one goes into a marriage thinking it will end, but instead we go there with the belief of a fairy tale ending. But when that fairy tale ends, you have to redirect the course of your life.
Imagine yourself in a canoe floating down a river. As you flow down the river, you encounter whirlpools that try to pull you down; rocks that try to stop you; waterfalls that try to break you. It is about making peace with your choices as you travel down the river and knowing that you have the power to choose how you will avoid the whirlpools, navigate around the rocks and find the courage to travel down the waterfall.
When you hold onto your beliefs that no longer serve you and to dreams that are no longer part of your vision, you will meet great rapids in your travels. But when you can make peace with life, the waters become calm and the future begins to appear over the horizon.
As a single mom you have the power and the courage to navigate the river of life with your children. The big question is: Will it be a flowing stream or ragging rapids? Remember that you do have a choice. You can turn your boat around at any time or adjust the navigation to find that calm, quiet flowing stream. "How?" you ask. By seeking out knowledge, listening to your heart and giving yourself permission to release your power and live in a place of courage.
You want to be the best mom you can be to your kids and your first step is being the best you can be to yourself. Unlock your power, align yourself with your personal values and live your life—the rest will happen. Know that you can love again, laugh again and feel again. Begin with living in the moment of your life and giving yourself permission to change course when you need to.
For More Single Mom Advice From YourTango:
- 5 Lessons Every Single Mother Should Learn
- Are You A Single Mom Ready To Date? Avoid 10 These Mistakes!
- Single Mothers Rock! Celebrating The Women Who Do It All