Mom Refuses To Celebrate 15-Year-Old Son's Birthday Because He Wants To Spend It With His Girlfriend — 'He Constantly Picks Her Over Me'
She admitted to being 'heartbroken' that her son doesn't want to spend his birthday with her since that's what they've done every year.
fizkes / Dobo Kristian / Shutterstock / KAVOWO via Canva Pro A mom received mixed reactions after admitting that she's "heartbroken" over the fact that her son wants to spend his birthday with someone else.
In a since-deleted Facebook post that was reposted on Twitter, the unnamed woman sought advice on whether she was being a "terrible mom" for claiming that she isn't going to go above and beyond for her son's birthday if he won't spend it with her.
The mom claimed that she was upset at her son for picking his girlfriend over her.
In the mother's post, she explained that for her son's previous birthdays, she would usually wake up early to decorate their house, bring him his favorite lunch at school, and make him his favorite dinner and dessert. At the end of the day, she would also give him his birthday gifts.
"I guess I just feel like it's the one day that a child should understand that their mom wants to be with them," she wrote. Her disappointment comes after her son recently told her that he would rather spend his birthday with his girlfriend, whom he's been dating for the last six months.
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Needless to say, Mom did not enjoy hearing that their birthday traditions were no longer a priority, and accused her son of constantly picking his girlfriend over her. "He tries to convince her what a horrible home life he has and lies to her about things that happen in our house to get attention from her," she claimed.
She admitted that she was crushed and upset that he was choosing to spend a day that she looked forward to with his girlfriend, and tried to point out that her son has "zero empathy" toward how this entire ordeal is making her feel.
"While I've tried to explain it to him, he's not hearing me. To him, it's his birthday and he should choose. I just thought I'd raised him to choose better," she continued. She's now refusing to celebrate her son's birthday with him at all.
As a response to her son's decision to be with his girlfriend, she admitted that when his birthday arrives, she won't be doing any of the usual celebrations that she's done in the past, and she is even planning to withold all of his gifts until Christmas.
"I'm not going out of my way to make the day special for him when he truly doesn't care that he is hurting me badly," she concluded.
While this mother's decision may be inherently problematic, her admission to feeling 'heartbroken' can be a relatable experience for parents.
The situation described by this teenage boy's mother is the type of behavior that is a natural part of adolescence. Spending time with friends, including romantic partners, is their way of trying to explore their own independence, and this doesn't mean that her son doesn't appreciate spending time with his mother.
As teenagers grow and become full-fledged adults, their relationships with their parents are also evolving and changing, which is why it's important that parents, especially this mother, should recognize and learn to respect these changes in their teen's lives. It doesn't mean they love you any less. They're just trying to figure out who they are on their own.
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It's nothing to be ashamed of that this mother is seemingly mourning the fact that her son is growing up, though instead of completely abandoning her son's birthday altogether, it wouldn't hurt to compromise with him and try and find some other way to celebrate with him.
This mom's admission that she feels broken up about her son spending all of his time with his girlfriend can also be a chance for her to discover her own identity apart from being a parent. Having personal interests, hobbies, and pursuits outside of parenthood can be something deeply fulfilling for mothers.
It can allow them to find and engage in activities that will bring them joy, satisfaction, and a sense of accomplishment because, at the end of the day, your sense of worth shouldn't be tied to your child.
This mother's experience highlights the importance of allowing teenagers to explore their identities, and by doing so, parents can also rediscover their own passions and interests. By nurturing this growth, it's an opportunity for both her and her son to learn and change together.
Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.