The issues that prevent a rapid adjustment to life after divorce are emotion-based and, as such, cannot be solved logically. All we can do is dissolve the disruptive energy they cause. For example, you got divorced and it's painful. You cannot "solve" the problem of divorce because, regardless of what you do, you are still divorced. The pain is the problem.
We asked 105 mental health professionals the following question: How long should a parent wait before starting to date again after a divorce? The plurality of experts agree that there's no [time] requirement; as soon as they'd like is just fine. Still, while it's up to parents to use their best judgment about when to start dating again, there are some rules all divorcés should follow when it comes to revving up the romance again. Here they are, in no particular order.
Since 1994, I have worked with thousands of marriages affected by infidelity. Sometimes the straying spouse is emotionally enmeshed with her paramour and intends never to return. Other times, the unfaithful mate feels remorse and asks for forgiveness and reconciliation. When that occurs, the hurting partner often struggles with deciding whether to divorce or give the wandering spouse another chance. If you face that decision, I suggest several things for you to consider.
Children of divorce often experience expectations of failure, fear of loss or abandonment and fear of conflict throughout their lives. These anxieties are reflected in their romantic relationships by poor partner or behavior choices, giving up too quickly when problems arise or avoidance of any perceived level of commitment.
With half of marriages ending in divorce, we wanted to get to the root of the problem. We surveyed over 100 YourTango Experts to find out the top predictors of divorce so that couples can know—in advance of getting married—whether their union is likely to fail.