If He Won't Do These 8 Things, He's Only With You For Sex

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signs he only wants sex
Sex

You've been warned.

There’s no shame in admitting that sometimes we want a relationship built entirely around sex and sometimes we’re looking for something more than that. The trouble starts when you and your partner aren’t on the same page with your expectations for your relationship.

It’s important to delineate what you both want from your time together, but there’s always the off-chance you’re not getting straight answers and questioning whether or not you should just walk away from the whole thing.

We’re here to help! Be on the lookout for these signs he only wants sex.

1. He doesn't introduce you to at least one of his acquaintances.

Don’t be that dummy falling for the “All my friends are jerks and what we have is too special for you to be around them” line. If he was really into you as a person, he wouldn’t mind you becoming part of his daily mix.


RELATED: What You Should Think About Before You Have Sex With Someone New


Obviously, you’re not just meant to be arm candy to show off, but if it’s been a few months, and you haven’t met a single other person in his life, even electronically, you’re not that important to him as anything other than a sex partner.

2. You never go on actual dates.

One of the great luxuries about being in a relationship is having someone to just chill with and be yourselves without any pretense. A real relationship involves enjoying each other’s company outside of the bedroom, even if you’re not doing anything constructive or mindful.

We all know that a “Netflix and chill” invitation is just a prelude to sex; if that’s all your dates are, he’s just there for the grand finale.  

3. You don't have real conversations... other than sexting.

This ties in with #2, but it’s self-explanatory; if the only reason he’s texting you is to set up another d*ck appointment or sexting to tide him over until then, in his mind, you’re just a friend with benefits.

No matter how busy someone is, if they’re actually interested in someone, they find a way to shoot the sh*t with them when they’re apart. End of discussion.

4. He never asks about your life.

To piggyback on the last point, if he’s interested in you, he’ll ask about your day or your background or your thoughts or what your upcoming plans are or anything pertaining to your life away from him.

Even if he’s “not a talker” and even if he will patiently listen to you vent about your immediate issues, if he shows no interest in digging deeper into your life than what you give him, there’s a pretty good chance he genuinely doesn’t care about anything but who you are between the sheets.


RELATED: 6 Ways To Be Mindfully Zen During Sex For SERIOUSLY Intense Orgasms


5. He only texts you at night.

Girl. Come. On. If he’s only texting you after midnight, he’s not thinking about you unless he’s bored and horny. Stop responding. 

6. He doesn't remember anything of importance to you.

This doesn’t mean he has to remember your mom’s birthday or the name of your first dog, but if you’ve mentioned an important appointment, vacation, visit from a friend, or a beloved relative more than once and he completely forgets, there’s a chance he’s not really listening to you in the first place.

While this can be hit-or-miss, if it happens consistently, there’s a solid chance he doesn’t just have memory issues.

7. He's not comfortable with you staying at his place, or staying too long at yours.

If you’ve been seeing each other for awhile but he still makes sure to let you know you can’t spend the night after sex, then you’re just a booty call. However, if he also rushes to give back any of your stuff that you’ve left there or the only spot in his house you’ve ever spent any time in is the bedroom, that’s more than a little strange if you’ve been seeing each other this long.

The same goes with his visits to your home; if he’s only comfortable being in your bedroom and only in small doses, you’ve got a red flag situation. Just like with his friends, if he genuinely cares about you as a person, he’ll want to incorporate you into his lifestyle little by little and will hope you’ll do the same.

8. He won't spend time with you unless he's guaranteed sex.

Okay, this one may seem obvious, but this also includes his attitude if, at the end of a date, you just aren’t feeling it and want to call it a night before your usual romp between the sheets.

If he gets angry, pouty, or otherwise outwardly frustrated and tries to make you feel guilty about saying “no” to sex, not only is he just using you for it, but he’s being gross enough to warrant never calling again. Seriously. Stop responding.


RELATED: 9 Signs He Doesn't Like You — He Just Likes The Sex


Liz Pardue-Schultz is a writer and activist based in North Carolina, where she overshares her bizarre journey through mental illness, recovery, parenting, and surviving Southern suburbia on her blog or anywhere she can get published. Her words have appeared in Huffington Post, Time.com, XOJane, Ravishly, ThoughtCatalog, and one time in the Letters to the Editor section of Playboy. 

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