How To Love Your Husband So He'll Do ANYTHING To Make You Happy

Get what you need, girl.

Oftentimes in a relationship, it can be difficult to express yourself and share the needs you have.

It can also feel like your husband is oblivious and doesn’t quite seem to understand how to help you meet those needs. So how can you get your needs and desires met in your relationship while also making sure that you’re not neglecting your spouse's wants, too?

Despite how complicated and difficult this puzzle may seem, according to licensed psychotherapist Dr. Zoe Shaw (in the inspiring video above), there is actually a simple way to do both of these things ... and you’ll feel like a superwoman once you’ve gotten the hang of how to make your husband happy!

Dr. Shaw says, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.”

This is especially true in a relationship when you have two people, often with completely different needs, trying to get what they want and need from the other person. So the best way to get your husband to give you that extra special care you're looking for? Make sure he’s receiving everything he needs!

Here are 5 tips to help your husband feel loved and appreciated, so that he’ll return the love in kind:

1. Make sure he feels appreciated and respected.

Men will go where they feel appreciated and wanted.

If he feels incompetent at home because of constant negative reinforcement, he’s going to start spending more time at the office or another place that he feels capable and appreciated. So make sure when your man does something right, you give him the proper gratitude and respect!

He really does want you to be proud of him, so this is very important.

2. Remember that you are not his mother.

Don’t dress him, don’t feed him, don’t tell him what to do or boss him around. He’s a grown man! He’s not going to want to be mothered by his wife.

If there is something that you’d like done differently, like perhaps a shirt you love to see him in, then tell him you love to see him in that shirt, or even just ask and tell him how much it would mean to you to see him in it.

Again, your man is going to want to make you happy, and he will feel respected because you talked to him, rather than at him.

Related: 3 Ways Guys Try To Communicate That We TOTALLY Miss

3. He is a very visual creature!

Your husband loves the way you look. He wants to see you in all of your sexy glory, so stop trying to hide your body from him in the dark.

Even if it’s hard for you, it’s important for your man to see you and to be able to experience arousal, which means leaving the lights on. Don’t be afraid to throw on some bravado and play-up the "sexy" for him, even if you aren’t particularly feeling it.

Remember, this is what your hubby, as a man, is going to need from you.

4. He gets hurt when you speak badly about him to your friends.

Your husband wants to be the number one person in your life, and you’re going to severely hurt his feelings and undercut the relationship if you gossip or talk poorly about him to your friends.

If you are having a marital issue, your best friend is probably far less qualified to dish out advice than a licensed therapist. Also, choose what you divulge carefully. You don’t want to say something that might demean him or cause him to be the butt end of a joke.

That’s not something you should do to someone you love.

5. He understands actions better than feelings.

Men are action people, most typically. They’ll want to solve a problem that you bring to them, whatever it is. If you need something more from your man, try and express it in an action he can complete — give him a starting point.

For instance, Dr. Shaw says, instead of saying “I wish you’d be more romantic,” tell your husband a specific action that you enjoy. You can try something like, “It really turns me on when you draw me a bath and put my favorite candles in there for me.”

This will give your man a place to begin, and perhaps even get him thinking about other things he can do to make you feel that way.


Related: How To Save Your Relationship When You're The Only One Trying To Save It
 

A happy husband will go to great lengths to make sure that his lady is satisfied, and if you’re meeting his needs, he will oftentimes go out of his way to make sure that yours are getting met as well.

Just make sure that you’re trying to show him love, respect, and appreciation, and pay attention to the good things he does around the house — a lot of women actually underestimate the amount of work their men do — so that you can make him feel proud to be in the relationship with you.

If you’re struggling with this problem or any other relationship issue and don't know what to do, reach out to Dr. Zoe! She’s here to help.

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Expert