7 Tips, Tricks And Techniques For Men Who Want To Have Multiple Orgasms
Oh, my!
weheartit Before I met my boyfriend I had never met a man who could have multiple orgasms. This is just one more of his amazing qualities I've added to the pile of things I love about him, along with "will prepare me raw cookie dough as a snack" and "will watch every single Hellraiser movie with me."
For me, it's a perk. For him, it's how sex has always been — a succession of several intense orgasms one after the other.
This isn't the case for most men, due to something known as the refractory period.
That's the scientific term for the span of time after sex when his penis returns to its flaccid state and cannot be touched without causing him to wince. Women don't have this, ostensibly because the Higher Power realized knew things were going to be tough enough for the females here on planet Earth as it is.
So basically, men have to wait before they can re-up to mate...
Not every man's refractory period lasts for the same amount of time and not every man is incapable of having more than one orgasm per sex session. In fact, some men claim that multiple orgasms are a thing men experience as well.
To help you give your own partner a boost in the orgasm arena, I interviewed a group of anonymous men who all claim to have or have had multiple orgasms.
Based on their input, here are seven tips, tricks, and techniques for men who want to have multiple orgasms.
1. Improve your tantric sex practices.
"I don't know if it counts, but whenever I practice tantric sex with my partner we both have multiple orgasms. The orgasms during the first phase of a tantric session are really different from the second wave of orgasms, but both are amazing."
In tantric sex practices, which were popularized by Sting (God help us all), the idea isn't to focus on reaching an earth-shattering orgasm, but rather to enter a state of "perma-orgasm" with your partner, in which you become one with them on a spiritual level. I don't know.
Apparently, after this comingling-of-the-selves type valley of an orgasm that occurs, a secondary orgasm follows.
If you really want to go at it multiple times in a row, definitely give this a shot!
2. Add some Taoist sex practices to the mix as well.
"I first read about ejaculation training when I started getting into Taoism. The idea isn't that you restrain yourself from having sex, but rather that you refrain from actually producing ejaculate. When I was practicing I'd follow these guidelines and they would lead to some pretty intense multiple orgasms when I finally couldn't take it anymore. "
According to Taoist beliefs, expelling semen from the body is a dangerous draining of vital energies. To that end, Taoists often practice good old-fashioned coitus interruptus. That's right. When they feel like they are about to ejaculate, they pull away and stop.
Today, while Taoism is still very much a thing, this idea of pulling away just as you are on the cusp of orgasm has a new name: edging.
Men who edge for the sole purpose of multiple orgasms say that stopping just before they orgasm during one sex session can absolutely lead to having multiples later and that it is well worth the temporary discomfort.
3. Put sex toys to work for you.
"I say this to my friends constantly and they don't buy it but, play through it. My instinct once I've had an orgasm is to end all contact with my penis. When I've gone for multiples, that plan doesn't work. Even though I'm sore or tender or just exhausted I ask my girlfriend to use her mouth or I use a toy to maintain my erection. If I go slowly enough after that first orgasm, a second one is possible."
Maintaining a man's arousal after his first orgasm by using your hands, mouth, or any of a wide array of sex toys is definitely one way to see if he's got another orgasm in him.
My boyfriend and I do this frequently and with great success.
While it can feel really uncomfortable for some men to have their penis touched immediately following an orgasm, guys who swear by this method say that the second orgasm is shorter, more intense, and feels even better than the first.
4. Do your Kegel exercises.
"I got totally obsessed with having multiples about three years ago and did a real deep dive research-wise into how to make them happen for me, and it turns out that Kegels were the key. Now, when I want to, I can hold orgasms back until I'm finally ready to let go and they come out in this rapid-fire stream of multiples."
Kegel exercises aren't just for ladies, guys! It makes sense that doing Kegels helps men better control their orgasms, as these exercises strengthen the pelvic floor.
This, theoretically, can make it easier for a man to control an orgasm on the rise and suppress it, leading to the "rapid-fire stream" referred to above.
Besides, there's no shame in doing Kegels for your overall health, anyway. You might find they help you last a little longer even if multiple orgasms don't come to you as readily.
5. Explore prostate stimulation.
"When my girlfriend and I want to go for a long time, she pegs me. When she is deep in my anus and stimulating my prostate, I can orgasm over and over and over again. It's truly insane. It feels very different from the orgasms I usually have during standard sex or from a blowjob."
Much like the difference between clitoral and vaginal orgasms, there's a difference between a man's average orgasm and the kind caused by massaging his prostate. If he has his heart set on multiple orgasms and nothing else seems to be working, make sure he's hydrated and all parties involved are well-lubed and give some anal play a go.
6. Gently press his perineum.
"My girlfriend does this thing where when I'm about to cum, where presses down on the skin between my testicles and my anus as hard as she can. It feels weird, but not painful, and it enables me to have more than one orgasm."
Note: This works, sure, but it may not be a great idea.
Within the community of folks who practice this technique, it's called "injaculation" and the sensations can be even more intense than a standard orgasm.
However, it can potentially lead to retrograde ejaculation, which is when your semen is redirected up your urethra and into your bladder, which is not a thing you probably want happening.
When you put pressure on this area you essentially stop up your urethra and that little fella is quite fragile and ought not to be messed with.
7. Handjobs
"When my girlfriend gives me a dry hand job I sometimes feel like I've had a powerful orgasm even though there has been no ejaculation. It really gets me primed and ready, as well as making me feel really satisfied."
Multiple men I spoke with told me they rely on handjobs for multiple orgasms. It is absolutely possible for men to orgasm without producing semen, something commonly known as a dry orgasm, although they don't talk about it often and they are most common among men who have undergone radiation, are injaculating or have had their prostates removed.
Can you blame them? If you want to make someone's libido drop just say the words "dry orgasm" out loud.
So there you have it.
May your quest for multiple male orgasms be a smashing, sexy success!
Rebecca Jane Stokes is a sex, humor and lifestyle writer living in Brooklyn, New York with her cat, Batman. She hosts the sex, love, and dating advice show, Becca After Dark on YourTango's Facebook Page every Tuesday and Thursday at 10:20 pm Eastern. For more of her work, check out her Tumblr.