An Anti-Date Rape App That Records Consent Is In The Works — Here's How It Works

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Sex

Could this really be a solution?

When I first learned that there was a new app in development to prevent rape, I was skeptical. Then I found out it was more than a digital blow horn app, and I was slightly less skeptical. The question of how to stop rape is a serious and complicated one. 

We have this idea that rape is perpetrated solely by violent, faceless strangers who attack men and women in the night. That’s not always (or even that often) the case.

If we want to figure out how to stop rape than we need to know what it really looks like.

Acquaintance rape is exceptionally common, and an app that keeps a record of who you have had consensual sex with, when, and where, could go a long way in preventing crimes like acquaintance rape.

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The app is not yet live, but creator Boffin Gerald Mark has filed a patent that he thinks, if used consistently on college campuses, might help end the “he said she said” of acquaintance-rape cases that can lead to women not being able to attain justice when they are assaulted and to men being falsely accused.

 

Related: I'm A Rape Survivor And Stripping Helped Me Love My Body Again

 

Here’s how it works: So you and a man, we will call him Captain Booty, are friends. You decide to co-mingle your genitals, effectively ending platonic love and inviting Eros into the mix. Groovy for you. 

Let’s be clear on this one fact: There is nothing sexier than consent. There just isn’t. I defy you to think of anything sexier than a person locking eyes with your and enthusiastically and passionately declaiming that yes, they would like to have sex with you. So what do you do next? You each take a selfie, accept the other’s selfie, and sign with a digital signature that you agree to have sex with each other. 

This is not a perfect idea. I have myself been too drunk to give consent but not too drunk to use my cell phone and operate an app. Also, there’s the problem of the sterile nature of opening an app and filling out some paperwork. I cede these points, but would also like to make it really clear that the general idea, holding both men and women accountable for their sexual encounters is a pretty awesome way to erase any potential gray areas when it comes to consent. 

 

Related: 3 Myths About "Consent" We Need To Put To Rest FOREVER

 

There’s a pretty basic misunderstanding about consent when it comes to sexual activity: People think it isn’t sexy. We need to nip this in the bud the same way we nipped the idea that wearing a condom wasn’t sexy in its respective bud. That doesn’t mean people won’t still try to avoid wearing a condom (exhibit the heinous sex “trend” of stealthing) but it does mean that we as a society pretty much are all on the same page about wearing a condom being much sexier than say, having a whopping case of the clap or, you know, a whopping case of "the baby." 


 

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Consent doesn’t mean you can't get weird with it and call your partner daddy.

Consent doesn’t mean you can’t cover each other with peanut butter and release bees into the bedroom if that’s your particular thing.

Consent doesn’t mean you can’t then explore your deepest, darkest, rape fantasies.

All consent does is allow you the greatest possible freedom in the bedroom with the person whose body you can’t wait to go nuts on. 

You know what’s really not sexy? Rape. Forcing someone to have sex without explicit consent isn’t sexy, it’s a crime. It also has nothing to do with sexiness and everything to do with exercising power and control and force over another person. 

 

Related: The Secret Fantasy Life Of A Sexual Abuse Victim

 

In an ideal world, yes, apps like this would be ridiculous: Why should we need an app to keep people from raping, a thing which everyone should know is horrible?

However, we don’t live in a world where everyone believes that rape is wrong — let alone that we live in a world where women are allowed to free reign to make decisions about their bodies like who gets to go inside of them and who gets to control what comes out of them and when. 

Does the idea of an app that works as a sexual contract seem cold and clinical and tragic? Only if you’re naive enough to believe that rape is an inescapable truth and you’d rather ignore it than “ruin” your already warped idea about what is romantic and what is sexy.